Nexustentialism

March 24, 2017

“My Body, My Feet” Movement Aims to End Unwanted Footsy

By Lane Wright

On Sunday afternoon, a group of impassioned students forewent their studies in favor of chanting “My body! My feet!” while marching in and around Davidson Library.

March 22, 2017

Girl Wearing Makeup to 8 a.m. Final is Better Than You

By Jenny De La Cuadra, Will McIntosh

“I thought there was this kinda unspoken agreement that we would all look like trash for the week as a community-strengthening thing”.

March 21, 2017

5 Most Romantic Spaces in the Library

By Emily Anne Williams

Are you afraid the love of your life might slip away because all you can think about are blue books and essay prompts? Have no fear! Nexustentialism is here to save your unraveling relationships.

March 16, 2017

What Your St. Paddy’s Day Outfit Says About You

By Will McIntosh

It has become common practice to dress up for the holiday with varying degrees of effort. Here’s a few examples of what your St. Paddy’s Day outfit says about you:

March 15, 2017

5 Good Places to Cry at UCSB

By Clayton Alexander

Here is a list of good public places to let loose a few tears ... you simp.

March 14, 2017

Top 8 Places to Break Out into Song and Dance on Campus

By Erin Lubitz

But with the impacted space on the UCSB campus, where does one go to pretend they’re on an open golf course and fully channel their inner Zac Efron?

March 13, 2017

Top 5 Spots for Cathartic Screaming on Campus

By Zoey Brandt

As finals week approaches, the desire to let out some of your stress in the form of a socially unacceptable shriek may threaten to overwhelm you.

March 10, 2017

How To Get a Spring Break Body

By Ariana Marmolejo

But fear not! We have the perfect answer to the burning question plaguing the millennial generation.

March 9, 2017

6 Pictures of Henry T. Yang Being a Silly, Silly Goose!!

By Amos G. Buttersnatch, Reptilia Ornthbee

We all know Chancellor Henry T. Yang can be a goofball sometimes, but what you’re about to see will certainly make you lose control of your bowels! This stack of photos left behind at a local Chuck E. Cheese’s reveal...

March 7, 2017

Time Capsule Unearthed at Campus Point

By Lauren Jensen

This past Sunday, third-year economics major Morgan Capano came across a mysterious metal item while hiking the trail around Campus Point.

March 6, 2017

Isla Vista Starbucks Implicated in Incorrect Order Scandal

By Jake Feder

Late last Sunday night, the Associated Press caught wind of a developing Starbucks-related fiasco in the lesser Isla Vista area.

March 3, 2017

Rec Cen Opens up Recreational Drug Use Room

By Ariana Marmolejo

“Wait, they don’t already have this?” said second-year English major James Thompson. “Then, yeah … I’m totally stoked!”

March 2, 2017

Spending for All Arts Programs Cut by the UC System

By Lil Furnace

This decision cuts UC spending for all arts programs and is effective immediately.

February 28, 2017

Trump Dumps Wall for Straight-Up Land Mines

By Avery MacGuire

President Donald Trump announced at a press conference that he will be going back on his campaign promise to build a wall between the United States and Mexico.

February 23, 2017

Sorority Sally “Distraught” After Beyoncé Drops Out of Coachella

By Sorority Sally

I feel like someone stuck their hand in my CHEST and RIPPED OUT MY HEART.

February 23, 2017

UCSB Pro-Nazi Meninists Feel Oppressed by Campus Liberals

By Vianna Mabanag

After the inauguration of President Donald Trump, UCSB pro-Nazi meninists claim to have been targeted by on-campus anti-Trump and anti-racism protests.