Weather

April 27, 2001

‘Cuz 60 Ain’t Bad

By Staff

But really, who is going to elect a candidate who is neither here nor there, nor anywhere except in the three-and-a-half inches at the bottom of Page 2?Sixty people, that's who.

April 25, 2001

Weatherstealth

By Staff

For the past two nights, the Weatherposse and I have executed stealth missions (photos coming soon to the Nexus website) to erect my A.S. popularity contest signs all over campus.

April 24, 2001

I’m the Coolest Kid in School

By Staff

All those other assheads running for A.S. president are apparently trying to turn this school-wide popularity contest into some kind of political election.

April 23, 2001

The Mysterious Mipple

By Staff

Life is full of mysteries. ... Who shot JFK? How do they get that cream filling into a Twinkie?

April 20, 2001

Next Time Won’t You Sing With Me

By Staff

Given the fact that today is 4/20, the Weathercorrespondents and I have compiled the "stoner alphabet" for your numb-minded pleasure.

April 19, 2001

Ooooh

By Staff

Spring is here, and you know what that means. Untalented skateboarders.

April 16, 2001

Cockfights

By Staff

Most "important" holidays have two sides: the story adults believe and the story children believe.

April 16, 2001

The Intro

By Staff

I have the social skills of a leper. A dead leper.

April 13, 2001

I’ll Hang Out With You … For a Fee

By Staff

Seeing that the Weathergraduation is in June, this is my last sorority rush, and I'll admit that I'll miss them ... but only for their comic value.

April 12, 2001

Going up?

By Staff

I hate people.Especially in elevators.

April 10, 2001

Do the Nasty

By Staff

There are a few things in this life that make me cringe, but nothing does the job quite like accidentally making direct, skin-to-plastic ass contact with a public toilet seat.

April 10, 2001

President Weatherhuman

By Staff

Look out.A fresh, new set of useless people has gathered in front of the Arbor to throw their bodies in front of the innocent in the name of ass-kissing.

April 9, 2001

Teamwork

By Staff

Professors control class size, grading and which kinds of sexual favors make up an acceptable bribe, but students hold the ultimate power: the ability to end class early.

April 6, 2001

Go Home

By Staff

In the words of the late beloved UCSB English professor Frank McConnell:"We don't do shit the first day, we don't do shit the last day. I don't know why the fuck they even pay me."

April 5, 2001

Crack-Smoking Overachievers

By Staff

When I was five, mean old ladies with superiority complexes and yellow teeth patrolled the playground armed with pink slips, whistles and explicit threats to "tell my teacher."

April 4, 2001