I have the social skills of a leper. A dead leper. With no eyes or ears. You see, over the last few weeks, I have noticed that I am plagued by the following awkward social play:

Cast of Characters (in order of appearance):
Mutual friend: Mutual friend
Weatherhuman: Me
“Pat”: Any person I don’t recognize

Act I, Scene i.

A public place.

Mutual friend: Oh, I’m so rude. I forgot to introduce you two. Weatherhuman, this is “Pat.”

Weatherhuman: Nice to meet you, “Pat”.

“Pat”: Umm, no, we’ve met before. A few times.

Weatherhuman: Oh. Sorry. Well, see you later.

Weatherhuman (aside): Fuck.

Exit Weatherhuman.

Tuesday’s forecast: Things look great at first, but then a cold front suddenly moves in and it becomes clear that you will not be getting any from “Pat”.