Curses!

April 27, 2007 by

Well, you bitches didn't elect the 'human as A.S. president... again.
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Vote ‘human or Die

April 26, 2007 by

The ever-controversial Dr. Kevorkian was paroled late last year in part due to his suffering, interestingly enough, from a terminal illness.
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Suddenly Seeking ‘human

April 25, 2007 by

It's been a while since the 'human was on the market, and quite frankly I'm a little disturbed with the way these kids sniff each other's asses nowadays while trying to reel one in.
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Vote ‘human

April 24, 2007 by

Vote Weatherhuman for A.S. president today on GOLD. I won't waste your money on bullshit cultural events; I'll drink it down.
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Weekend Update

April 23, 2007 by

Saturday's newspaper delivered a swift kick to an already indignant Weatherhuman.
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Just Add Water

April 20, 2007 by

The Top Ten Signs the ‘human Has Checked-Out for 4/20 1) A huge puff of lazy, lingering smoke drifts out from the Weathercave 2) I’m so fucking high 3) Friday’s Forecast:
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Time On My Hands

April 19, 2007 by

It's been a few days since the 'human enjoyed the embrace of another human, and because it's been such a long time, the possibility of blue... um... wait
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Lose Lips Sink Bananna Boat

April 18, 2007 by

The minions at DLG found out about last night's planned food fight, so I feel justified in reviewing this, once more:
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Yikes

April 17, 2007 by

I'm not going to touch a joke today with a 10-foot pole.
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Euro-trashed

April 16, 2007 by

It's never too soon to think about graduation, to dream about venturing out into the world and leaving your stamp on every corner, to seek out completely original adventures that no one else has done.
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Board to Run

April 13, 2007 by

"An individual is really at his finest when involved in a campaign," Former A.S. President and Reagan speechwriter Ken Khachigian says in an interview printed in today's paper.
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Kilgore Trout’s Alter Ego

April 12, 2007 by

Call me 'human...
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Standing Ovation for Sitting or Standing.

April 11, 2007 by

The "Stand Up Against Hate" ad that's been running in the Nexus lately has me more confused than a 13-year-old going through puberty.
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You’re a good paper, Daily Nexus

April 10, 2007 by

Psychoanalysist Lucy Van Pelt once said, "I never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did once, but I was wrong." Peanuts to that.
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Landslide

April 9, 2007 by

This marks the 25th year the Weatherhuman has run for A.S. president, and this is going to be the one.
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