It’s been a while since the ‘human was on the market, and quite frankly I’m a little disturbed with the way these kids sniff each other’s asses nowadays while trying to reel one in. Take yesterday’s date the ‘human went on. The Weatherdate opened up like a Chinese fan within the first minute, telling all about how daddy left and how the ‘date had serious problems. Since I didn’t order the crazy, I left. The only baggage I want involves a trunk possibly with junk.

Wednesday’s Forecast: The Weathermate successfully woos the ‘human back by reminding me of how not fucking crazy it is.