Multimedia

Santa Rescued from Sinking Sleigh by Heroic Surfers

“At first I couldn’t believe it,” second-year environmental studies Joseph Wilkins, one of the rescuers, said.
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Sorority Sally’s Top 10 All-Time Favorite Christmas Songs

Before you begin wondering why there’s no Mariah Carey or Michael Bublé included on this list, you have to remember that these are my favorite Christmas songs.
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How To Avoid People from High School 101

You thought you would never see them again after you threw your cap in the air, but if you go home for the holidays, you are bound to see at least 60 percent of your graduating class at some point.
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Overheard in the Library

It’s the most wonderful time of the year. No, not Christmas season, finals season. At least it was. But now, the library is empty and we move on with our lives.
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Fantasy Sports Island: NFL Week 14

Our fantasy football aficionado, Richard Benites informs us about the latest emerging players that we should all have on our radars heading into Week 14 of the NFL season.
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Ralph Hasenhüttl: The Perfect Wenger Replacement

Staff writer Ryan Burns breaksdown the rise of Arsenal since the addition of Ralph Hasenhüttl at the helm.
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22 Last Minute Ways to Raise Your Grade

Do not sleep. At all. It slows down the brain and prevents further learning.
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Friendship Manor Gives Up on Noise Ordinance, Throws Rager Instead

The drinks were flowing all night as slutty nurses spoon-fed the elderly residents Jell-O shots, and orderlies laced their oxygen tanks with dank kush.
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Professor Only Curses To Impress Freshmen

Students have claimed that his casual F-bombs and “shits” don't make his second-rate retelling of elementary school history any more interesting.
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Nexus Top 10: Sports Curses

Think your favorite sports team is cursed? Well, maybe our own Richard Benites will confirm your suspicions with his list on the Top 10 Sports Curses!
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Fantasy Sports Island: NFL Week 12

Our fantasy football aficionado, Richard Benites informs us about the latest emerging players that we should all have on our radars heading into Week 11 of the NFL season.
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Illegal Candle Trade in Dorms At All-Time High

“They were pleading innocent, but you could tell they were lying,” Capt. Morgan said, shaking his head. “Who would use peppermint-scented candles before Thanksgiving?"
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Obama Barricades Self in Oval Office, Refuses to Let 45th President In

Shortly after meeting with President-elect Donald Trump and participating in a civil photo-op, a composed Obama immediately kicked everyone out, grabbed a pint of Cherry Garcia and then locked the doo...
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Which Subtweet Should You Tweet Next?

What fun is the internet if you can’t talk shit? Don’t worry, these subtweets have your back.
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Common Cold War: Students Weaponize Sickness, Bring Down Entire Dorm

"It's like being in a gang, man. When one of us gets sick, the whole building gets sick. It's a way of life."
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