Multimedia

The Birds at Ucen

May 16, 2019 by


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Last Rites

May 16, 2019 by


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Egg

May 16, 2019 by


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Goat Boy: Work Ethic

May 16, 2019 by


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Coughing in Lecture Hall Recreates Beethoven’s Fifth

May 16, 2019 by

In a miraculous turn of events last week, midterms on UCSB campus became mysteriously musical. Surely every student who has had the misfortune of slogging through the college cold and flu season (whic...
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Senior Reminisces on Marks He Has Left on UCSB

May 16, 2019 by

ISLA VISTA — Graduating senior Bob Lee-Fluids seductively laid upon his hand-me-down couch in his Del Playa home contemplating the last four years of his college experience. He looked lovingly upon ...
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Student Too Embarrassed to Return to Bike Shop, Walks to Class Instead

May 15, 2019 by

Pop! Third-year UC Santa Barbara student Anthony Wheeler knew the sound all too well. The back inner tube of his bike had popped and soon the sound of grinding metal on concrete soon grew apparent as ...
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Extravaganza Lineup Announcement Unjustly Forces Students to Listen to New Music

May 14, 2019 by

Once again, Extravaganza season is upon us and with the release of the lineup for the highly anticipated concert on Sunday, there is a wide mix of reactions among students. With big names like Aminé ...
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Chancellor Yang to Headline Extravaganza

May 14, 2019 by

Well folks, you heard it here first. Our beloved Chancellor, Henry T. Yang, will be headlining this year’s Extravaganza festival, according to A.S. Program Board, who announced the lineup yesterday....
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Student Preemptively Rolling for Extravaganza

May 14, 2019 by

Today, nearly a whole business week before Extravaganza celebrations are due to begin, UCSB student Molly Poppins decided to preemptively get in the spirit of the festival the only way she knows how -...
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HERO ALERT: Man Goes Down on Woman

May 13, 2019 by

ISLA VISTA, CALIFORNIA — A bold and valiant display of heroism took place in the wee hours of Saturday morning when local man Bryce Daniels performed oral sex on his girlfriend Jessica Payton.
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BREAKING: College Professor Actually Just Big Idiot

May 10, 2019 by

This past Tuesday, Professor Joe Kerr of environmental studies accidentally misprinted the midterm for a class of over 800 students. As it turns out, Kerr printed a midterm from Winter Quarter three y...
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Emotional Sensitivi-Bee

May 9, 2019 by


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Bird

May 9, 2019 by


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Panda Express Line Reaches All-Time High, Chaos Ensues

May 9, 2019 by

Earlier this week, during the daily lunch-rush feeding frenzy at the University Center’s Panda Express, the wait time for this inauthentic — yet no less delicious — cuisine reached an all-time h...
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