Weather

February 4, 2002

Meathead in Training

By Staff

The containers for weight gain and muscle growth formulas are really large.

February 1, 2002

I Am the Lizard King!

By Staff

WH: "Sorry Ray, I was imagining myself as a giant infectious microbe. That's how microbes talk."

January 31, 2002

All of These Are Deductable

By Staff

The weatherfund is tapped.

January 30, 2002

Brine Shrimp Make Flamingos Pink

By Staff

I have several new friends. Last week I purchased and hatched sea monkeys, the playful sperm-like ambassadors of the deep.

January 29, 2002

Thighs of Steel

By Staff

Since the abduction of El Canario, I have obtained a new weathercycle. It is approximately 9 feet long, red and weighs about as much as a 1972 Volkswagon Beetle.

January 28, 2002

Weather Phone Transcript

By Staff

"Ring Ring" Me: "Hello." Telemarketer: "Hello, may I speak to a Weatherby Huuman."

January 25, 2002

This Time, Things Will be Different

By Staff

Every quarter I find myself falling into into the same study habits.

January 24, 2002

Anthrax Smanthrax

By Staff

The weatherpet uses biological weapons.

January 23, 2002

The Annoying Has Become the Hunted

By Staff

Angry nocturnal elephants roam in my neighborhood.

January 22, 2002

Keep Your Arms Inside the Car

By Staff

I honored Dr. King yesterday with a trip to every meteorologists' favorite theme park, Weather World.

January 18, 2002

12:00

By Staff

What To Do When I.V. Blacks Out Like A 120-pound Sorostitute Who’s Drank An Entire Bottle of GHB-Laced Bacardi 151: 1) Stop studying. You cannot study in the dark. 2) Call friends and carefully observe that, &#8220...

January 17, 2002

Is That Your Final Answer?

By Staff

I figured out how to pay off the weatherloans.

January 16, 2002

Lecture Hall Hygiene

By Staff

There is no polite way to tell someone their stench is suffocating.

January 14, 2002

The Cart of Darkness

By Staff

There are many professions which deal with the dark aspects of humanity: doctors, divorce lawyers and journalists are just a few.

January 14, 2002

They’re a Deal at $130.

By Staff

Sneakers reached the limits of tasteful, sensible design in the late eighties. Since then sneakers have splintered into the cross trainer, the tennis shoe, the basketball shoe ...

January 11, 2002

Bwaaaa!

By Staff

The WeatherNeighbor got too drunk at the WeatherPad last night and awoke this morning with a wicked hangover. She ran to the bathroom to vomit, but one of the WeatherHousemates was already in there taking a shower. She b...