Opinion
Normally, if I said so-and-so went down on me and didn't come up all night, I'd get a high five. But when the so-and-so that started to blow has the initials G-O-L-D, the result complicates my life co...
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Funny how people feel the need to get you ridiculously shitfaced on your birthday. Each year we embark on a new journey, and the first steps taken are wobbly ones.
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Republican State Senator Pete Knight issued a challenge Monday to the Domestic Partners Rights and Responsibilities Act of 2003, previously AB 205, signed into law by our very own Gray Davis on Sept. ...
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The winds of change have blown hard all summer. The governor is soon to be replaced by a murderous-but-popular machine from the future, and Karl Malone is on the Lakers.
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Shiny, spacious and still smelling like new, Manzanita Village is the Carnival cruise liner of UCSB's dorms. San Miguel, conversely, is like a canoe with a broken paddle floating in a sewage treatment...
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ritten on their banner at their table was something I found totally disgusting. The banner said, "Just Jew it," and had the Nike Swoosh superimposed over the Star of David. So, does Nike sponsor G-d n...
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Demanding money is getting harder and harder these days. Back when the bipolar stock market was in one of its manic swings, it was a different story. Nowadays, in our war-torn, misguided and generally...
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We fell in love with the surroundings and lifestyle, and have been fortunate enough to make a living in this little slice of paradise. We welcome you with open arms and wish you the best of luck with ...
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To call Isla Vista a dilapidated, overcrowded and overpriced slum would be, well, a bit of an understatement. The phrase "student ghetto" comes to mind. Apparently the technical term is "blighted."
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Loop up. Now. Because this is as pretty as UCSB will be all year. And I'm not talking about the flowers.
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Despite being in Greece for a good chunk of the summer, I've already begun to learn a lot about apartment living, or at least apartment living with three other girls.
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Never has the question "What the hell happened?" been so apt. It's like California suffered the Attack of the Thousand Subleasers. Now we're all left to vacuum up all the crazy remnants of this surrea...
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With elections approaching, I wanted to take this opportunity to address some questions I have been receiving from students and other members of our campus community regarding Proposition 54, the Clas...
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"Can you spell that one more time, Mr. Governor?"I can already see the veins in Arnie's massive neck bulging, prompting similar action in his forehead. "I already spelled it 10 times: S-C-H-W-A-R-Z-E-...
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In these troubled times for starship earth, it is reassuring to think that our own UCSB is looking out for the future. While it could confine itself to mere education, it is working to solve the probl...
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Ends on ‘good terms’ but is blocked on Instagram
Slow fade
Ghosting them on a random Monday
“It’s not you, it’s me”
Drunk Uber “we need to talk” voice memo
Presents a notes app pros and cons list
Asks to still be friends
Drops their stuff off, never speaks to them again
Texts “this isn’t working” then posts from another country
“It’s not me, it’s you”
Tells them they need to focus on Econ 10A
Delivers a hand-written letter to their mom
