Opinion
Those morons at PETA have done it again, this time fighting congressional legislation that would make fried chicken the official picnic food of Kentucky. See what I did there, three of the last eight ...
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Back in the day, when we were 11 or 12 - you may not have even hit the double-digits yet - we pre-pubescent techies discovered the virtual world of America Online. Because we hadn't experienced real I...
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On Feb. 15th, 2007, I participated in an event that I will never forget. Thousands of UCSB students joined me on a march to the 217 freeway in a protest against the war in Iraq. I was one of those peo...
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The average college student sleeps about seven hours per night, while the typical requirement for adults is eight hours per night. Obviously, everybody knows the atypical person who functions just fin...
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I usually try not to crack on fellow Nexites, but I can’t help but take offense with the latest “Wednesday Hump.” If you’re writing about attractive presidential candidates, yo...
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People are always asking me, "Jordan, what's globalization about? How will it affect me? Will I be outsourced?"
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If you were so "fortunate" as to see George Bush's final State of the Union address or you've been "lucky" enough to have caught bits of Sen. John McCain's, R-Ariz. recent campaign speeches, you are w...
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I remember my "oh shit!" moment vividly. It was in the spring of last year, and I was walking to class on a warm sunny day. A fellow student stopped me on the main path that passes by Storke Tower wit...
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Time to find an exit. The party had severed since the host made Biggy bounce out, so I didn't have to spot a clock to realize it was a shade past midnight. But halfway through a Hefeweisen, and I'm al...
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Aren’t you glad that I’m around to bring you stories like this one: Police in St. Augustine, Fla., arrested a motorist for strapping a 24-pack of beer into a seatbelt, leaving a 16-month-o...
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Super Tuesday has completely shifted the momentum of the Republican race for the party's presidential nomination. In only 24 hours, Ariz. Sen. John McCain was catapulted into the lead with 680 total d...
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Seriously people? McCain and Clinton? I realize that most of you probably voted for Obama because it’s the hip student thing to do, but what a disappointing day for California. Forget immigratio...
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A werewolf who definitely howled mid make-out
A performative male dressed as Tyler Durden
The mime that somehow made it hot and cool
The ghost of your situationship (no, it’s actually them)
Frat vampire, and your neck will be bleeding
The angel that has definitely never gone out
The literal devil
A prisoner with fake tattoos that you can pretend are real for the night
A sexy cowboy that definitely used the ride line at least four times
A Patrick Bateman who relates a little too much
The witch who asked for your zodiac sign first
A nurse who will leave you needing CPR
