I took a look around and realized I'm back here again.
Finding clues to a riddled life printed on cardboard cereal boxes. Nutritional facts for a starved teenage imagination. Gathering deeper meaning...
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Google claims I'm doomed to a self-destructive and self-defeating path. That, or I'll find the death and rebirth I've apparently been searching for. But I'm pretty sure I don't intimately know anyone ...
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Uncomfortable. As in the feeling I get when a crackhead-turned-probation officer can't stop shouting her paranoid delusions at me from the passenger seat: "The fucking pigs are going to recognize my r...
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"Well, I'm thinking about finding a place in Pacifica. I hear it's really foggy, but at least the rent's cheaper."
"You'll fit in perfectly, son. You've been growing up your whole life in a fog."
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Time spent sleeping equals one-third. Time spent dreaming approaches infinity. Where would you be without infinity?
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Valentine's Day: Aside from Columbus Day, it's probably my least favorite holiday, year in and year out. Maybe I can't get over the fact that both celebrations completely ignore what actually happened...
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Time to find an exit. The party had severed since the host made Biggy bounce out, so I didn't have to spot a clock to realize it was a shade past midnight. But halfway through a Hefeweisen, and I'm al...
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I'm sure I wasn't the only one to ever enter Isla Vista for the first time and think, Damn, if I ever get enough money, I'm buying out the houses on the mountainside of Del Playa Drive. Erosion may ta...
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Stale urine trickled down the inside of his leg a drop at a time, eventually soaking the black dress socks he'd just bought that morning. He would have laughed if it wasn't for the tension in the offi...
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"Ooh, yeah. We're jamming." As coils of smoke spiraled upward toward the rafters of the Hub last Sunday night, reggae aficionados crammed together in anticipation for one of the biggest musical prodig...
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Looking for live music this Saturday to start your partying on the right note? Need some rock to help shake off that troubling hangover? Well, look no further, because it's time for a ride down Route ...
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So you're under 21 and all you want to do is get drunk - wait, strike that - all you want to do is get drunk as cheaply as possible. There is no question that Isla Vista is one of the easiest places t...
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Oh shit. I'm in the middle of the road. Wait, am I? Fuck the cars Jeff, just keep pedaling. That's it - wait. Shit. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. Hey, never mind, this isn't so bad; didn't I wan...
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Choked by their cap tassel during a graduation photoshoot
Accidentally daps the Chancellor up as they receive their diploma
Decided to skip commencement to go day drink on Del Playa
Ugly crying so hard they drown out "Pomp and Circumstance"
Posing on stage like there's a model scout in the audience (there was)
Can't make it up the steps due to the sheer amount of cords, stoles, and leis
Couldn't decide on a grad dress so they showed up in pajamas under their gown
Showed up to commencement high and suffering from horrendous munchies
Somehow juggling the 15 ceremonies required for their triple major
Graduated with a 5 year plan, chronic anxiety, and a great internship
Reading Kafka in the audience in hopes of an honorary English degree
had their graduation photos taken in the lagoon to be different
