Opinion

April 1, 2009

April Foolishness

By The Weatherhuman

Today's the big day: the day when you get to put in action that evilly genius plot you've masterminded over the last month to get your roommate back once and for all.

April 1, 2009

Chris Farley For Commencement?

By Theo Tansgood

Editor’s Note: This article and all others included in today’s print and online issue are falsely formed for the sole purpose of the Daily Nexus’ April Fools Issue and do not reflect any form of truth o...

April 1, 2009

Womyn Want Respect, Bitches

By Indi Gogirl

April 1, 2009

Construction Forces Famed Hobo Out

By High Handle-Bar Hobo

March 31, 2009

Alcoholism

By The Weatherhuman

Fuck you, UCSB.

March 31, 2009

Freedom of Religion?

By Megan Laffey

Growing up in America, I have always been thankful for all the freedoms we have, especially our freedom of religion. I know in many other countries people are attacked daily for their various faiths and religious views. ...

March 31, 2009

Campaigns Should Not Blind A.S.

By Steven Wolfson

It seemed like any other ordinary Wednesday afternoon as I frantically typed up a resolution in the A.S. main office.Â A committee discussed how many items to purchase for an event, doors swung open and shut an...

March 30, 2009

On TA-Student Crushes and Bad Grades

By Igor Hiller

Hey there. It’s me, Igor, your friendly neighborhood advice columnist. If you have a tribulation a-brewing, write to me at opinion@nexus.com, or drop your question in the opinions box in the Nexus office under Stor...

March 30, 2009

Food Fights Show Immense Disrespect

By Michael Bates

I'm a De La Guerra Dining Commons employee, and my name is Michael Bates, better known as Dancing Pizza Guy or its many variations. Last quarter, I witnessed a food fight break out. I simply asked, why? Some of you may p...

March 30, 2009

Old Friend Misses Roger Crona

By James Cassell

My name is James Cassell. I am sad to see that Roger Crona has died ("Roger Crona (Or Was it Jason von Straussenburg?) Dies at 62," Daily Nexus, Mar. 5). He was a good friend of mine from age 6 to age 18, when we lost tr...

March 30, 2009

Political Playground 2009

By Staff

March 9, 2009

Turds and Tulips

By Staff

Unrelenting, conniving turds to Steve Pappas for refusing to know when enough is enough. In life, there are winners and losers. Then there are assholes. Dirt poor, shriveled up turds to all of the university’s budg...

March 9, 2009

Things Not To Do When You’re Drunk

By The Weatherhuman

A word to the wise: If you're large, male and drunk, there are certain things you should and should not attempt.

March 9, 2009

On Joblessness, Loneliness and Anxiousness

By Igor Hiller

Hello there, it’s me, Igor. This column is due Sunday morning, and it’s Saturday night, and I’ve been drinking because my editor Nicki Arnold told me to be more advice-y because people have been writing...

March 5, 2009

Oh Baby, Just One More Time

By Staff

It's been a long time and I really need to get some. I'm dying for some action! I need it two more times before we go off to Spring Break. I'm not embarrassed to admit it's been over three months since I've really been p...

March 5, 2009

GIANT PENIS

By The Weatherhuman

Did anyone else notice the blood bus by the arbor today? Not too unusual on its own, I know. But I did care for its juxtaposition next to the girl dressed up as a giant vagina across the way.