Local woman hyped for Valentine’s Day card haul from dentist, Victoria’s Secret
“Contrary to popular belief, I actually receive much correspondence from a variety of suitors,” McKinsey purrs contentedly.
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“Contrary to popular belief, I actually receive much correspondence from a variety of suitors,” McKinsey purrs contentedly.
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After three long years of slaving away (looking on Quizlet) and breaking our backs (using ChatGPT) for our degrees, I can confidently speak for all seniors when I say: We are tired.
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Print this out, laminate it and carry it around at all times for easy perusal.
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Ahh, the sweet sound of healthy communication.
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What’s the point of President’s Day anyway? To get a couple more hours of shut-eye on our brand new Sleep Number smart mattress?
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Where else can you consume 40 whole cloves of garlic on a pizza in front of your unsuspecting Bumble date? Fuck you! Who do you think you are?
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“Heart? Stolen. Panties? Soaked. Hotel? Trivago.”
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While it may forever be a mystery as to why our institution by the sea is such a strong attracting force for students across the country, we can sleep soundly with the knowledge that we are in the com...
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There’s a whiff of something new in the moist breeze of Isla Vista — that’s right, it’s the season of luuurve here in our very own crack den of a college town! One deep breath in through the n...
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As tensions surrounding the return to online classes reach a breaking point, our favorite fancy chancy, Daddy Yang himself, is losing popularity faster than you can say “flop era.” Although the fo...
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Hopefully this guide has illustrated the slight, but crucial differences between a post-quarantine slip-up and being an inherent fuck-up! Now go out there, have fun, and be safe! Or don’t, because y...
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Do you often find yourself utterly bewildered as to the function of everyday objects? Are you also disillusioned with the barren landscape of our fine institution? Well, you’re in luck, because for ...
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This new surge in popularity of activism-adjacent paraphernalia has led to the overproduction of Instagram infographics to the point of market saturation
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Biggcok has emailed some of her young-ish eligible professors for “assistance with the material.” When asked to specify what type of assistance and with what material, Biggcok failed to produce a ...
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Likely one of the only times the Trump children have ever witnessed their father using the L-word so brazenly and yet so tenderly, it is almost certain that at least one of them (probably Eric) burst ...
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