As syllabus week draws to a close and the happy buzz of Isla Vista’s Welcome Weekend parties slowly slip away, UC Santa Barbara’s senior population grows increasingly restless. After three long years of slaving away (looking on Quizlet) and breaking our backs (using ChatGPT) for our degrees, I can confidently speak for all seniors when I say: We are tired. We are tired of the congested bike lanes ruining our morning commute. We are tired of being hounded by club tablers in the Arbor (except for you, Anna, please notice me). We are tired of every seat on the fourth floor being saved by someone’s vape pen. We’re done.
Local senior Mike Wazowski corroborates this sentiment, “I stepped into my lecture in Campbell on Thursday and it was just, like, full of people. I can’t fucking believe I have to sit with these losers. What are they even doing here?” When reminded gently that we are all attending a university, Mike scoffed. “Yeah, and?”
Many others feel the same apathy.
“I barely made it to my lecture on Friday because I didn’t want to go, and what am I rewarded with for showing up? A fucking QUIZ. Do they know who I am?” We asked fourth year Patrick Shih what kind of class assigns a quiz on the first day of class. Shih said, “They made me check into class on iClicker. I haven’t used that shit in ages, bro. I thought I was going to pass out.”
Wazowski and Shih are both part of a growing body of seniors who are protesting against the stringent requirements that UCSB imposes on its students. Not only are we seniors expected to go to lectures, but we are also sometimes called on to participate in group projects and partner discussions. But that’s not all! On occasion, the professor will ask a question and expect people to raise their hand to answer. It’s like we’re in the “The Hunger Games” or something. Call me Primrose Everdeen, because I’m letting someone else volunteer. Perhaps this seems like simple work for a first, second, or even third year student. However, for our senior citizens, anything beyond showing up to class is really pushing it.
However, there are some upsides to senioritis. Shih smiles while recounting, “I was like, totally flabbergasted about the iClicker at first, especially because I was hungover from going downtown last night. But I aced that shit, dude.” He chuckles to himself. “I still got it!”
Miss Informed plans to never show up to class again.