Sierra Vakili

June 1, 2023

Stories from Storke: 2022-23 Senior Reflections

By Emily Kocis, Daniela Gomez, Sierra Vakili

Graduating Nexus seniors reflect on their time under Storke Tower.

January 26, 2023

Letter From the Editor: New Name, Same Stench

By Sierra Vakili

And while we will remember our time as “Nexustentialism” fondly, we, the current editors, respectfully, need a goddamn upgrade.

July 3, 2022

I Lived It: Bearing The Burden Of Being The Funniest Bitch In The GroupMe

By Sierra Vakili

I am too funny for the society I find myself buried within.

May 27, 2022

Daily Nexus “Best Of” Winners 2021-22

By Sierra Vakili, Valerie Fu, Emily Kocis, J. Matteo Wharton, Holly Rusch, Atmika Iyer, Daniela Gomez, Garret Harcourt, Stephanie Gerson, Marisol Cruz, Sindhu Ananthavel

The Nexus surveys the UCSB student community annually to pick the best locations and services within the local area based on voting through a Google Form. The winners of our survey are listed here.

October 28, 2021

Festive! Sunday Scaries Temporarily Rebranded to Sunday Spookies

By Sierra Vakili

What a treat! Now, as you attempt to cope with the unbearable weight of the seventeen assignments you procrastinated atop your shoulders on a daunting Monday eve, you can think about two ghosts holding hands! Neat, right...

September 23, 2021

Cottage Hospital Introduces ICU Bunk Beds

By varun iyer, Sierra Vakili

Patients at Cottage reportedly enjoy the new bunk bed experience. In addition to inter-patient intercourse skyrocketing 76%, patient morale seems to have been boosted by the new project as well.

April 27, 2020

Storke in the Age of COVID-19: UCSB’s Favorite Tower To Chime Each Hour on New Facebook Livestream

By Sierra Vakili

Upon the March 25 announcement that UC Santa Barbara officials had “no intention” to adjust tuition for a remote spring quarter, students were forced to face the harsh reality that all their services, although...

March 1, 2020

Phony in Phelps! TA Actually Eight Raccoons in Button-up, Khakis

By Sierra Vakili

PHELPS HALL — A wave of disillusionment fell over the faces of 20 wide-eyed pupils Thursday upon their discovery that their beloved teaching assistant, lack of living wage and all, was not the mathematical wizard they ...

February 14, 2020

UCSB Introduces Department of Student Vibes

By Sierra Vakili

UC Santa Barbara officials announced Tuesday that an all-new student-resource department would be making its way to campus in the fall of 2020: the Department of Student Vibes. In the brand-new Student Vibe Center, stude...

February 6, 2020

Excess Waffle Batter Oozing from Waffle Machine Reminder That You’re a Failure

By Sierra Vakili

ORTEGA DINING COMMONS ‒ A shallow pool of wasted waffle batter solemnly finds itself spread out upon a pitiful tin pan underneath the machine for which it was intended. For second-year student Emma Fahler, this accumul...

February 1, 2020

Heroes of Isla Vista: Hoe Doesn’t Get Cold

By Sierra Vakili

ISLA VISTA, CALIF. — Third-year student Lindsay Thompson has been turning heads this frigid winter quarter in the classic tube top and miniskirt combo — but Thompson, a Santa Barbara six at best, is not attracting an...

November 28, 2019

Horoscopes: Fart Edition

By Sierra Vakili

ARIES (March 21 – April 19) See how long you can make your next fart last. You may be surprised by the result. GEMINI (May 21- June 20) Be on the watch for two farts for the price of one. CANCE...

October 31, 2019

How to Survive UCSB Flu Season

By Sierra Vakili

It’s that time of year again — the skeletons are both spooky and scary, the usually bustling streets of Isla Vista have grown hauntingly quiet and during lecture, you’re surrounded on all sides by fellow Gau...

September 26, 2019

Freshman and Former NASA Intern Can’t Wrap Head Around Bike Loops

By Sierra Vakili

A river of tears sprung from the face of incoming freshman Enya Stein last week as she helplessly puzzled through her first encounter with the UC Santa Barbara bike paths. Stein, despite graduating as her high s...