Opinion

January 10, 2005

Stay Healthy for Life

By Staff

Rejoice! John Basedow, the disproportionate "Fitness Made Simple" guru, has apparently waved goodbye to this life. He was on vacation in Thailand when the tsunami hit, and things didn't work out.

January 10, 2005

Private Dancer: A System With a Soul

By Alec Mouhibian

When I was a little child, my morality was driven by fear - not of God, but of Santa. Even if my parents had indulged me with religious teachings, I have a feeling that my fear of going to hell would have been less than ...

January 10, 2005

Child Molester Needs to Leave UCSB Family Housing

By Stuart Levenbach

Once upon a time, Victor Sciortino forced a little girl to give him oral pleasure. He was convicted and incarcerated, then re-entered society not too long ago.

January 7, 2005

Go for the Obvious

By Staff

With a new year come new opportunities. The last few years have frankly been disappointing, because "Infant" has dropped off the government's list of the top 1,000 U.S. baby names.

January 7, 2005

Get Out of My House!

By Mark Signa

Welcome back. It's been pretty quiet over the last few weeks without you. The streets of I.V. were as chilly and quiet as a reception for Howard Stern at a NOW convention.

January 7, 2005

Our A.S. President Should Step Down

By James Young Patrick Dickey

It's time for Morris to go. On Tuesday, Jan. 4, Associated Students President Cervin Morris was formally arraigned on felony charges of assault with a deadly weapon and misdemeanor battery.

January 6, 2005

Reality’s Crappy Grip on Television

By Monique Moyal

I don't really understand this reality TV fad. And by no means am I exaggerating when I say you can flip through every channel on your 100-plus cable listing and find at least 25 reality shows, with more or less the same...

January 6, 2005

Look Out Below

By Staff

I.V. is getting a rock climbing thing! There's a fence surrounding that excuse for a park on the 6600 block of Pasado, and it's accompanied by a picture of a big, fake rock.

January 6, 2005

He Said, She Said: Let’s Cut to the Chase, Baby – No Mind Games Necessary

By Chris Trenchard

Back in junior high, I used to rock these green and brown plaid No Fear shorts pretty much every day. By the end of my tenure at Orinda Intermediate School, they had assumed two holes, several menacing grass stains and o...

January 6, 2005

He Said, She Said: Keep Them on Their Toes By Playing ‘Em Hot and Cold

By Lauren Creamer

In grade school I broke my wrist playing tag. Tripping in a game these days doesn't result in broken bones; it results in a broken heart - unless, of course, you're a member of the UCSB men's basketball team.

January 6, 2005

FCC Media Crackdown Threatens First Amendment

By Patrick Callahan

Those darn Republicans are at it again. For the past several years under the Bush tenure, the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) has been cracking down on the television and radio programs that it believes degrade t...

January 6, 2005

A Mini-Guide to Fighting I.V.’s Absurd Rent Prices

By Ken Virzi

It's that time of year again in I.V. when management companies try to get us to think that if we don't sign a lease now for next year then we will be shit out of luck because nothing will be left.

January 6, 2005

Nexus Should Not Be a Place for Political Masturbation

By Helen Mortera

Since childhood, I've always thought political bumper stickers were a silly idea. After the election, it's like a bad one-night stand - love it or loathe it, you're still stuck with it.

January 5, 2005

Obey Your Purse

By Staff

This quarter I'm taking a class about how to find efficient, low-cost solutions to problems. The textbook for the class costs $160.

January 5, 2005

A Sexual Smorgasbord

By Dave Franzese

I'll miss you, Winter Break -- and when I say "I", I mean "my guts." For the three weeks that I was home, my father and I were locked in a ferocious battle of competitive sport-eating. We'd start everyday at breakfast, e...

January 5, 2005

Let’s Do Our Part to Help Tsunami Victims

By Henry Sarria

Throughout my years growing up, I can remember my mom saying the following: "The Lord helps those who help themselves." This is a saying that obviously sticks in my mind to this very day.