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Hamas Sponsors Terror

A Palestinian suicide bomber detonated himself inside a busy restaurant in central Tel Aviv last Monday, in the deadliest terrorist attack since 2004. Despite a high level of alert in Israel for the J...
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Last Chance

Today is your last chance to vote for A.S. elections. You know what that means, you apathetic slackers that haven't voted yet: It's time to vote 'human.
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Border Guards Must Dig Deeper

As American controversy over immigration reaches a climax, we at UCSB must ask ourselves this important question - would Jared Goldschen or Romy Lea Frazier make a better A.S. President? That's my fir...
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Halt Dark Side’s Continual Spreading of Lies, Stupidity

I'm writing in response to James Baron's letter to the Nexus "The Dark Side Uses Footage of Halloween for Party Film" (Daily Nexus, April 26). I had never actually been to the website before he wrote ...
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Use Your Own Hands

Masturbation is universal: male or female, we all do it. However, when in an active sexual relationship with an actual human being, we find that the need to spank is not so pressing and is generally f...
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None today.

The weatherhuman didn’t upload his/her file.
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Wave the U.S. Flag, Not Mexico’s

The recent immigration bill battle leaves much to be desired with both the legislators in charge of making the law and the actual protesters themselves. Politicians are an easy scapegoat in most matte...
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People Watching In Classes Can Help Stave Off Boredom

If you're reading this, I apologize - you're probably not at the beach. In fact, you're probably stuck in class, drowning in a stormy sea of boredom, desperately floundering for a brief gasp of entert...
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The Dark Side Uses Footage of Halloween for Party Film

The Dark Side (www.thedarksideofucsb.com) wanted to show people, particularly parents of incoming freshmen, what the party scene in Isla Vista looked like. We hired someone to film the party scene las...
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Summer of Love

It's official: Our parents sure did a lot of fucking in July and August.
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Fight for Sudan’s Rights

Often in U.S. history, college students have been ahead of governments in recognizing and fighting for important issues. In 1961, students launched a historic journey into the Deep South on the Freedo...
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TBTN Helps Empower Survivors

As you walk through campus this week, you may notice an addition to the landscape of green and turquoise campaign signs: five hundred purple posts, numbered one through 500, with the letters TBTN on t...
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Canadian Immigrants Taking Over White Collar U.S. Jobs

With all this talk about immigration and "closing the borders," I couldn't help but get to thinking. Maybe instead of closing our southern border, those ever wise and self-righteous men in Washington ...
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Honor Armenian Survival

This article is dedicated to the memory of the 1,500,000 Armenians who were martyred during the Turkish massacres, which culminated on April 24, 1915.
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Advantage: Human

It
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