Mind, Body & Soul
Well now that you’ve all had the glory of saying you hooked up with a French maid, a firefighter or a slutty version of Kate Middleton, it’s time to snap out of that Halloween daze and get back to...
read more
There are a lot of good things about threesomes. You get to find out what your friends are really like in bed, you can actually live out the experience you already lied to your friends about having an...
read more
In “Legally Blonde,” Elle Woods refers to Cosmo as “the Bible.” While Cosmo did give me step-by-step instructions on how to give my first blowie, I don’t think I’d quite put it up there ne...
read more
If you haven’t had the sheer terror of waking up in a bed that’s not your own, with your first thought being, “I need to get the fuck out of here,” then you haven’t lived. No, I kid, I kid. ...
read more
Four long years ago, I was a senior in college. I don’t remember much about that year (but that’s the subject of another column entirely—perhaps Memoirs of an Old Town Tavern Addict or Long Isla...
read more
Your number. No, not your phone number, your number. It’s not something you can touch or see. Materially, it doesn’t exist. But oh is it ever there. Haunting you, reminding you of the good, the ba...
read more
Remember the good ol’ days? A simpler time of land lines, missed connections and face-to-face breakups. When a drunken booty call came from the sound of pebbles ricocheting off your window and flirt...
read more
Do you ever undress a hottie with your eyes and imagine what Shorty’d look like if she dropped ’em to the ground like she ain’t got manners? That does seem to be the goal doesn’t it — gettin...
read more
Just out of curiosity: When was the last time your fuck of the night bit your ear, whispered, “How do you want it?” and you responded, “Baby, give it to me in missionary. I really want to just l...
read more
My name is SF and I am celibate. It has been a ridiculously long time since my last penetration, and I am here to defend my choice of abstinence. I would first like to clarify that I am in no way clai...
read more
The life of an exchange student is a constant influx of new experiences, knowledge, food, ideas and people — basically whatever you can put into your mouth, grab by the hand or both.
read more
Doctor, here are my symptoms: I am confused, I’m questioning my identity and ability to reason and my genitals are swelling up like an ocean wave at the sight of a hot chick.
read more
In school we are taught that cheating is an extremely severe offense punishable with failure and in some cases expulsion, but how many of you sneaky bastards have gotten away with a little dishonesty ...
read more
Ever heard the expression, “The harder you have to work for it, the better it is”? Well, this is the message I want to shout from every rooftop to all of womankind.
read more
What does a feminist look like? Is it a dirty, Birkenstock-wearing, peace, love and happiness hippie with hairy armpits and a hairier bush? Why do we have this image of what feminism might mean?
read more
Ride through the bike path without crashing
Find a seat at the red couches on the second floor of the library
Sunrise and sunset dip on the same day
Find parking on Del Playa Drive
Drunk for 24 hours
Bagel crawl
First pick at an Arbor muffin in the morning
Participate in a mosh pit at a band show
Finally talk to their class crush
Get an earlier pass time than their friends in GOLD
Graduate
Successfully walk through I.V. without seeing an old hookup
