Mind, Body & Soul

November 21, 2012

Gay, Straight,Vanilla, Kinky, Polyamory, Femme, Butch: In the Palette of Sexual Tastes, Minorities Are Not One, But Many

By Anonymous

In my recent reflections, I have found myself considering society’s approach to sexual minorities. From fetishism to transgender attraction to polyamorous behavior to non-heterosexuality, non-normative sexual behavior ...

November 14, 2012

Queen of the Hill: Tingling Tales of Girl-On-Top

By Hayley E.

Good day, my raunchy readers! Today we will be pondering the complexities of girl-on-top. This entails subtopics such as where a male’s hands should be, the paramount importance of hip-guiding and the foolish insecurit...

November 7, 2012

Who’s On Top and Who’s On Bottom: The Sex Politics of Positioning

By Anonymous

It is with this article today that I wish to start examining the way that sex has shaped our culture, particularly as it is relevant to I.V., and I feel an excellent place to start this is by examining an interesting asp...

October 31, 2012

Putting The “O!” in Oral: Ladies Never Spit And Gents Never Quit

By Hayley E.

My dearest Gauchos, today we will be discussing the do’s and don’ts of oral sex. Now, I have qualms with both my XXs and my XYs regarding your respective oral habits, and this may result in being a bit of a rant. You...

October 24, 2012

Just Short of Naked: Halloween Costumes That Work Your Assets

By Anonymous

As Halloween approaches, I find myself wondering what wonders the October holiday has in store for me. Will I relive freshman year, when a downpour melted the “costumes” off of a group of Isla Vista women, and my fri...

October 17, 2012

Let’s Play: Toys in the Bedroom

By Hayley E.

Ladies and gentlemen, I come before you today a woman who enjoys indulging in her favorite adult toy when her roommates are gone. I am an avid fan of toys and if you aren’t, then you’ve probably never had one. Though...

October 10, 2012

Coming Out With a Bang: This Hump Columnist’s Out and Proud

By Anonymous

Readers, it is with my first words that I must apologize: This Hump will not be on the seduction strategies of women in I.V. as was promised last week. Instead, I have been compelled by a number of sources, internal and ...

October 2, 2012

Four Men Any Isla Vistan Knows … and Many Have Slept With

By Anonymous

With the first weekend of school recently past, I find myself in the aftermath of what few parties I could be dragged to, analyzing the information I gathered from them. While adrift in our beloved deluge of drunks, I at...

September 24, 2012

First Year Fornication: To Hump One or Many, That is the Question

By Anonymous

As the new school year dawns, I find myself inundated by the increased amount of strange faces around IV. These are undoubtedly our new and deeply respected incoming freshmen, and so allow me to welcome any new freshmen ...

August 1, 2012

Lessons From The Bachelor and the Older, Sexless Buddy

By Dana Olsen

Once upon a time, there was a man who wanted to keep his relationship with a girl casual. Let’s call him a “noncommittal dating partner.” Understandably, however, he was often mistaken for a boyfriend by innocent b...

May 30, 2012

Thrusting to the Finish: Seniors Knock Boots Before Riding Into the Sunset

By Opinion Editor

It’s that time of the year again. June gloom slowly creeps up, with the calendar bitching at you to get your life together while your hands desperately shove tequila shots down your throat in an attempt to shut your br...

May 22, 2012

Coming Out on Top: The Down-Low on Bending the Straight Line and Pegging the Sexually Confused

By Anonymous

If you ever feel like risking your immortal soul, it is my suggestion that you peruse Craigslist’s casual encounters. The activity is quite enjoyable, especially if you are as demented as me and my close friend and tur...

May 16, 2012

Prude to Crude: How One Freshman Found Her Inner Freak

By Anonymous

Until college, I was the prude. The hot Asian prude, but nonetheless the prude. At my ironically slutty all-girls Catholic school, everyone tried to hide their obvious skankiness. And while my boyfriend and I had been do...

May 9, 2012

Who’s on Top? How Society Dictates Your Position in Life and in the Bedroom

By Anonymous

Now, I know I have almost beaten gender roles in our society to death, but I’ve still got one last little bit to harp on. All of this theory is leading up to something — a part of my sex life an astonishingly large a...

May 1, 2012

Respect Your Elders: Keep the Legacy Alive (Beneath the Sheets and Beyond)

By Opinion Editor

Alumni Weekend came as quickly as an undersexed 35-year-old with a full-time cubicle job as soon as he spots something fertile. Like a dark, ominous cloud — holding not refreshing showers, but a disturbing concoction o...

April 25, 2012

Where to Turn When BROing and HOing Have Lost Their Appeal

By Opinion Editor

Most unfortunately, in order to speak of this next topic, I will have to address something fetid and repulsive. I’m going to talk about an aspect of intercourse that is often lost, forgotten, feared, denied and even de...