Opinion

October 7, 2002

Drink of the Week

By Staff

I used to like the sparrow family in the UCen. They're cute when they fly up and perch on your chair. They clean the floors of excess croissant crumbs.

October 7, 2002

Special Election Endorsements: MCC Lock-In Fee

By Staff

The MultiCultural Center is asking each student for $1 per quarter in the form of a lock-in fee to continue its incredible program of free shows including dramatic, dance and musical performances, as well as lectures, re...

October 4, 2002

Take That, News-Press

By Kenneth Pettit

At the risk of competing with an organization that owns a barrel of ink, I will respond to the editorial "What is this, Florida?" published in the Santa Barbara News-Press on Sept. 27, 2002.

October 4, 2002

Getting to Know All About You…

By Staff

Centuries ago, men and women were shown the implements of torture and given a chance to confess their sins before being tried and burned at the stake.

October 4, 2002

You Must Be Kidding; DP Can’t Get Any Worse, Right?

By Jon Eggart

This week, many Isla Vista residents may have noticed the spray painted lines in the center of their street. I came home from class today to see two construction vehicles outside my house with jackhammers.

October 3, 2002

Brits, Booze and Big Ben

By Suresh Samuel

London is to Europe what New York is to the U.S. You can walk out on the street at any time, day or night, and feel the energy of the city as you join thousands of people on the streets.

October 3, 2002

One-Liner (Maybe Two)

By Staff

One-Liner (Maybe Two)

October 3, 2002

Living Without Vowels: Patriotism Sells: Americans Cash In on the Grand Old Flag

By Steven Ruszczycky

If you search for "unity ribbons" on Google, the first two websites you'll find can explain to you the intricacies of pagan cultures. American memorabilia vendors take a back seat, the first starting as the third site in...

October 2, 2002

Huffy, Schwinn and Natural Selection

By Staff

The freshman packs are dwindling down to groups of four and five. Some might attribute this to them "settling in," but I think I know better.

October 2, 2002

IVFP’s New Chum

By Staff

On Sept. 23, Lt. Tom McKinny quietly rode into town, polished his badge and stepped into his new position as head of the Isla Vista Foot Patrol.

October 2, 2002

Oh, Won’t Somebody Please Think of the Grizzly Bears?

By Brendan Buhler

The clamor of the morning zoo rumbles from each car as horns blare, windows lower, doors pop open and hundreds of commuters scream. The grizzly bears are going to work.

October 2, 2002

Use Water-Based Lubrication to Ease the Bump, Grind and Slide

By Beth Van Dyke

Let me give you freshmen a little something to contemplate about before going to town on your first anal adventure: Getting it up the pooper sucks without the proper lubrication.

October 2, 2002

Residents Should Question I.V. Foot Patrol’s Behavior

By Valerie Ibarra

On Saturday night, a law enforcement officer threatened to take me to jail. All I did was ask a question. For what violation could he have arrested me? For being drunk in public?

October 1, 2002

Is There Porn on Your Computer?

By Staff

Somewhere out there is a god among internet advertisers. This is how the scam works:

October 1, 2002

The Red Tape: Buzz Off

By Josh Braun

The West Nile virus is spreading, the death tolls in America are reaching the hundreds this year and there have been thousands of reported cases of infection.

October 1, 2002

A Greek Tragedy

By Staff

As parties on Del Playa rage on, fueled by beer and the collective sex drives of hundreds of 17- to 23-year-olds, some of UCSB's greeks lament the loss of their right to booze it up Isla Vista-style in their own homes.