Opinion
I'm a little, nervous shit, so at my first UCSB party I walked up to this gigantic senior carrying a bottle of vodka and asked him, "So, how do you get a girl around here?" He didn't respond with comp...
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Man, these dreary winter days of rain drag the quarter on and on and on. Fuck that. Certainly the profes sors understand th at rain is a totally valid reason for an abs ence or three. Rainy days are m...
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Lots of times I get ideas for this box just by flipping through the newspaper. Truth is stranger than fiction, I always say, and so much more powerful.
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A Massachusetts state representative recently stated that allowing gays to marry would violate natural law. Has anyone realized that divorce is also not part of the natural law of marriage?
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Why me? This actually is probably the most asked question of any police officer anywhere. Why did I get the speeding ticket and not everyone else who was speeding too? Why'd you stop me when there are...
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Move off the rails, there's a train coming through. Students' Party has been formed through the collaborative efforts of members of the S.A.C. and S.U.N. parties.
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With the dawn of a new millennium came the rise of the metrosexual - a distinctly cultured breed of straight men whose taste in art, fashion, personal grooming and interior design mirrors that of his ...
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Sorry, don't have much time to write today. I'm going to the Lakers game and I'm about to miss my bus.
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Some people prefer the kind of sex where you barely move and your eyes are shut so tightly that a crowbar couldn't pry them open. Others still would rather have sex only in the pitch dark under the co...
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"Ask the Lawyer" will be a recurring column presented by Associated Students Legal Resource Center attorneys Ron Perry, Robin Unander and Steve Rice. The aim is to present legal information that stude...
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People are saying San Francisco's mayor might be throwing away his political future with his bold stance in favor of gay marriage. Maybe so.
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Last time I checked, there was a provision in the U.S. Constitution called the Eighth Amendment that holds that "cruel and unusual punishment" shall not be inflicted upon the citizens of the United St...
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I was very disappointed with James Baron's opinion piece about UCSB's failure to monitor his daughter's life. He wrote, "I often wonder where the Andrew Fastows, O.J. Simpsons and David Attiases come ...
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Terrorism has been the defining issue for this presidency, and it might still be the biggest issue in the next presidential term. Those of us who plan on voting this November should probably put some ...
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Many Americans consider homosexuality itself to be ghastly. Since the author compares gay discrimination to racial segregation, he clearly believes they do not choose to be gay but are born that way.
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A werewolf who definitely howled mid make-out
A performative male dressed as Tyler Durden
The mime that somehow made it hot and cool
The ghost of your situationship (no, it’s actually them)
Frat vampire, and your neck will be bleeding
The angel that has definitely never gone out
The literal devil
A prisoner with fake tattoos that you can pretend are real for the night
A sexy cowboy that definitely used the ride line at least four times
A Patrick Bateman who relates a little too much
The witch who asked for your zodiac sign first
A nurse who will leave you needing CPR
