Opinion

October 1, 2003

Ejaculation Is for Girls Too

By Christina Huff

My best friend and I were having a heated debate over the validity of female ejaculation. Having never experienced a gusher before, I rejected his idea that they are real.

October 1, 2003

Isla Vista: A Slum of a Most Memorable Character

By Samuel DeFranceschi

When I say that I.V. is a microcosm of America's worst and best, I mean a lot of things. American lifestyle, history and attitudes manifest in these harsh Santa Barbara conditions at levels seen little elsewhere on earth...

October 1, 2003

War, Recall and Hell’s Hostile Takeover of Earth

By David Downs

Truth may be the first casualty of war, but just because it's dead doesn't mean you have to drag it down the street with its guts trailing behind it as double-jawed hyenas gnaw on the gristle.

October 1, 2003

UCSB Fraternities and Sororities Decry I.V. Porn as Bad Business

By Laura Mulligan Panhellenic President

As Panhellenic president, I would like to clarify the fact that the UCSB greek system does not in any way support the recent activities involving pornography that have taken place at certain parties in Isla Vista.

September 30, 2003

Uncaged

By The Weatherhuman

More ugly birthday savagery, but this time one of the weatherfriends was the victim. Drunk, delirious the friend was having a good time-until being spotted by the Sasquatch.

September 30, 2003

Malicious Misinformation

By Alan Sachar

The Palestinian-Israeli conflict is decades old, and it often seems as though there is no end in sight. Following the breakdown of the Quartet's "roadmap" peace plan and the resignation of Palestinian Prime Minister Abu ...

September 30, 2003

The Artful Dodger: Just Try to Ignore the Talking Pavement

By Drew Mackie

"You know this isn't wrong." The pavement near the edge of the 6600 block of Pasado Road told me so. If I'm not mistaken, this mysterious message of reassurance became part of the Isla Vista landscape when some pro-war l...

September 29, 2003

One More Day, Please

By Staff

God, the first weekend of the school year goes fast. For two days we get a little taste of the freedom and carelessness we basked in all summer. We get wild, time gets blurry, then, boom, it's over.

September 29, 2003

A Subdivided Closet Case

By Travis Cannell

I awake at 8 a.m. to get into the bacterial jungle that is my shower. As a train rumbles by and causes the foundation of my building to shake, I wonder if my shower is actually going to get me any cleaner than I currentl...

September 29, 2003

Everything a Student Could Ask for and More

By Henry Sarria

As the guy referred to as the "longtime Isla Vista resident," I feel the need to write the obligatory "Welcome to I.V. piece for you, the incoming UCSB freshman class of 2003-04.

September 26, 2003

Porn Is Not the Enemy

By Daily Nexus Editorial Board

Slithering into Isla Vista in a grimy rut well-worn by the vices of alcohol, drugs, sexual harassment and objectification is that lusty, gonad-shaking demon called porn.

September 26, 2003

Drugstore Cowboy: This Isn’t Comedy Central?

By Cory Anthony

The circus surrounding the upcoming recall election on Oct. 7 has made California politics the best source of laughs since George W. coined the term "strategery." Wednesday night's debate did not disappoint.

September 26, 2003

Don’t Blame Us When Your Kids See Your Breasts Online

By Michael D. Young Vice Chancellor S.A. Yonie Harris Dean Of Students

We in the UCSB administration have no desire to monitor or regulate your private lives. We do, however, believe you should be warned about an exploitative new "business" practice that might impact you or your peers

September 26, 2003

Politicians Don’t Belong in Office; Schwarzenegger Does

By Madeline Zamoyski

For those of you who missed it, let me recap. Lt. Gov. Cruz Bustamante admitted that he and Gov. Gray Davis "spent too much" in the past few years, mounting to a $12-20 billion deficit.

September 26, 2003

Racial Statistics Can Cause Discrimination as Well as Prevent It

By Charles Akemann UCSB Mathematics Prof.

Private companies (e.g. banks and insurance) are prohibited from collecting racial and ethnic data. Proposition 54 would extend that ban to the public sector, with certain exceptions.

September 25, 2003

We’ll Use them for Kindling

By Staff

So the university is sending out fliers on the dangers of Halloween revelry in hopes that they will discourage students from inviting their friends to town and partying like mad.