God, the first weekend of the school year goes fast. For two days we get a little taste of the freedom and carelessness we basked in all summer. We get wild, time gets blurry, then, boom, it’s over. We wake feeling shitty on Monday and find that the harsh realities of school have only grown harsher after two study-less days.

In that way the first weekend is a little bit cruel. Like visiting a buddy in rehab and slipping him a few lines between the pages of a magazine. Not that the ‘human knows anything about that.

Monday’s forecast: Occasional sniffles, a cloud of regret.