Staff

May 12, 2003

Post-Mother’s Day Blues

By Staff

I sincerely hope that you all had a pleasant Mother's Day. I know you all went home or called or sent nice cards.

May 9, 2003

Eeny-meany, Mediany, Mode

By Staff

Weatherfriend 1: "They're opening a new statistics department."Weatherfriend 2: "We don't have one?"Weatherfriend 1: "Yes, but we're starting another one."

May 9, 2003

May 7 – May 16, 2003

By Staff

ippies and punk rockers collaborating in the '70s are like Britney Spears and Metallica sharing a stage, today. Yet fate brought the Doors' ex-keyboardist and L.A. punk rockers X together to break ground in the early '80...

May 8, 2003

Ah, Parking Services, Where Art Thy Sting?

By Staff

I was late for an exam yesterday and decided to drive to campus. Being short on time and spare change for a parking pass, I decided to take advantage of one of Parking Services' deluxe $30 spaces.

May 8, 2003

Think

By Staff

May 8, 2003

Hookin’ it Up

By Staff

May 8, 2003

Do Try This At Home

By Staff

May 7, 2003

It’s Just No Gouda

By Staff

Don't eat the cheese. Specifically, don't eat the Tillamook-brand extra-sharp cheddar currently on sale at Vons.

April 30, 2003

Letter Misinterprets Intent of Signs on Women’s Center Lawn

By Staff

This is in response to Scott Englund's letter (Daily Nexus, "Protest Signs Tell More About Liberal Delusions Than Iraqi War," April 28, 2003). As an employee of the Women's Center, I would like to firstly explain the sig...

April 1, 2003

Sheriff To Begin Debtor Smackdowne

By Staff

In an effort to improve safety and the Chancellor's reputation for maintaining order, Sheriff of Islavistingham Crist‹o Madeira, pledged Monday to crack down on Knaves and Debtors in the seaside hamlet.

February 21, 2003

Council Fishes For Way to Save U.S. Marine Life

By Staff

The National Marine Sanctuary Advisory Council met Thursday to tackle the issues of preservation and the enhancement of marine life, in a two-day meeting of the 12 National Marine Sanctuaries chairs at the Chase Palm Par...

January 27, 2003

Ad Misrepresents the Aim of Planned Pregnancy Advocates

By Staff

Reproductive rights advocates are committed to defending legislation that recognizes women's moral and legal right to determine whether and when to become pregnant.

January 13, 2003

Good Grub

By Staff

When Columbus sailed in the 1400's (and yes, I know he didn't discover shit...), he and his crew took to eating meals at night around halfway through the voyage.

January 9, 2003

Pushing the Envelope

By Staff

Postage goes up because of people like me. I only buy stamps out of absolute necessity, and I refuse to purchase an entire book of them for any reason.

January 9, 2003

Readin’, Writin’, ‘Rithmatic

By Staff

I have a bone to pick with the quarter system. Depending on the courses I take, I probably have somewhere between 100 and 300 pages of reading to do per week, per class.

January 9, 2003

January 9 – January 15, 2003

By Staff

Hey, winos, listen up! Santa Barbara's favorite wine bar, Elsie's, located at 117 W. De La Guerra in downtown Santa Barbara, is hosting an artsy-fartsy par-tay tonight!