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Weather: Little Webbed Bastard

April 19, 2002 by

Childhood figures do not have sex. Despite allegations, Scrappy is not the love-child of Velma and Scooby. Skipper is Barbie's "younger sister" and Huey Dewey and Louie are just bunking with their ric...
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Candidates

April 19, 2002 by and

If you ask Maggie Stack what the most important thing an Associated Students president can do, she says, "Go to committee meetings."
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Our Sports Facilities Are in the Shitter and Need Money

April 19, 2002 by

The student-initiated referendum for the enhancement of our athletic facilities is exactly what we need. The improvement that would be made under this initiative would encompass a wide variety of impr...
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Policy Endorsements

April 19, 2002 by and

Sports and activity facility fee
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A Bad Word From This A.S. President is Badge of Honor

April 19, 2002 by

I'm proud of receiving Brian Hampton's un-endorsement for A.S. president. Hampton achieved 0 of his 12 Gauchoholic campaign promises - even with a majority Legislative Council comprising of Gauchoholi...
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Don’t Let Jocks Throw a Fast One

April 18, 2002 by

It's that time of year again; everyone on campus is looking for a handout. Students of UCSB - don't let the university fool you into paying for new sports facilities.
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What to Give the Great Buddha?

April 18, 2002 by

Thursday's Forecast: A swift kick to the nuts.
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Leggies Need an Experienced Wrangler

April 18, 2002 by

The Associated Students internal vice president is the one person responsible for making sure that the student government runs smoothly.
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‘Gauchoholic’ Is Just a Republican Sissy Drink

April 18, 2002 by

The Gauchoholics have made their plea to students through signs and other media that they are a nonpartisan political party whose ultimate goal is to represent "the average student." Simply put, this ...
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UCSB Needs Full Stack, Not Half-Empty Stack

April 18, 2002 by

As the current Associated Students president, I have the greatest understanding of what the duties and demands of the position entail.
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Student Finds Coverage of Women’s Sports Just Plain Loco

April 18, 2002 by

Wow, still no mention of the women’s basketball team pulling off a huge upset in the NCAA tournament and already an article predicting that the men’s team will be going to the Sweet Sixtee...
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Vegetarian Student Can’t Stomach Tasteless Meat Jokes

April 18, 2002 by

I have a personal gripe to voice. I am getting a little tired of people teasing me for being a vegetarian.
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It Affects Me: Part 2: A Nice Evening Turns Ugly

April 17, 2002 by

She was a mess; her hair was all matted, mascara everywhere, her eyes were puffy, red and soaked with tears. She was shaking. It was bad.
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Pussy Melon

April 17, 2002 by

I love stupid useless crap. That is why I'm ecstatic over the grand-opening of the Isla Vista dollar store. Morning Glory's replacement is chalk full of discount pasta, Chinese made mermaid dolls, des...
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Give Your Ex the Axe

April 17, 2002 by

People are walking around holding hands with their significant others, all snuggly-wuggly - and you just want to whip out a shotgun and blast all those idiots into oblivion.
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