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In the Still of the Night

October 8, 2002 by Alex Benowitz-Fredricks

It really is a form of tranquility when totally new people can be relied on to behave in exactly the same ways, be duped in exactly the same ways and disappear in exactly the same ways.
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Drink of the Week

October 7, 2002 by Staff

I used to like the sparrow family in the UCen. They're cute when they fly up and perch on your chair. They clean the floors of excess croissant crumbs.
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Special Election Endorsements: A.S. Base Fee Initiative

October 7, 2002 by Staff

A.S. has the ability to call a special election whenever it pleases, and this one seems more in the interests of the executive board than of student groups.
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Special Election Endorsements: MCC Lock-In Fee

October 7, 2002 by Staff

The MultiCultural Center is asking each student for $1 per quarter in the form of a lock-in fee to continue its incredible program of free shows including dramatic, dance and musical performances, as ...
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Take That, News-Press

October 4, 2002 by Kenneth Pettit

At the risk of competing with an organization that owns a barrel of ink, I will respond to the editorial "What is this, Florida?" published in the Santa Barbara News-Press on Sept. 27, 2002.
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Getting to Know All About You…

October 4, 2002 by Staff

Centuries ago, men and women were shown the implements of torture and given a chance to confess their sins before being tried and burned at the stake.
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You Must Be Kidding; DP Can’t Get Any Worse, Right?

October 4, 2002 by Jon Eggart

This week, many Isla Vista residents may have noticed the spray painted lines in the center of their street. I came home from class today to see two construction vehicles outside my house with jackham...
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Brits, Booze and Big Ben

October 3, 2002 by Suresh Samuel

London is to Europe what New York is to the U.S. You can walk out on the street at any time, day or night, and feel the energy of the city as you join thousands of people on the streets.
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One-Liner (Maybe Two)

October 3, 2002 by Staff

One-Liner (Maybe Two)
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Living Without Vowels: Patriotism Sells: Americans Cash In on the Grand Old Flag

October 3, 2002 by Steven Ruszczycky

If you search for "unity ribbons" on Google, the first two websites you'll find can explain to you the intricacies of pagan cultures. American memorabilia vendors take a back seat, the first starting ...
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IVFP’s New Chum

October 2, 2002 by Staff

On Sept. 23, Lt. Tom McKinny quietly rode into town, polished his badge and stepped into his new position as head of the Isla Vista Foot Patrol.
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Huffy, Schwinn and Natural Selection

October 2, 2002 by Staff

The freshman packs are dwindling down to groups of four and five. Some might attribute this to them "settling in," but I think I know better.
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Oh, Won’t Somebody Please Think of the Grizzly Bears?

October 2, 2002 by Brendan Buhler

The clamor of the morning zoo rumbles from each car as horns blare, windows lower, doors pop open and hundreds of commuters scream. The grizzly bears are going to work.
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Use Water-Based Lubrication to Ease the Bump, Grind and Slide

October 2, 2002 by Beth Van Dyke

Let me give you freshmen a little something to contemplate about before going to town on your first anal adventure: Getting it up the pooper sucks without the proper lubrication.
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Residents Should Question I.V. Foot Patrol’s Behavior

October 2, 2002 by Valerie Ibarra

On Saturday night, a law enforcement officer threatened to take me to jail. All I did was ask a question. For what violation could he have arrested me? For being drunk in public?
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