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Worthless ‘human

February 6, 2006 by

The incompetence of the Seahawks seemed to have rubbed off on the Nexus. Damn this small space that prevents the 'human from making some witty super bowl reference.
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Don’t Fuss Over Political Spoofs

February 6, 2006 by Andrew Levine

Muslims around the world have stunned me with their violent and misguided reaction to the recent publications of Muhammad cartoons in European newspapers.
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Faculty Scams Students

February 3, 2006 by David Schachner

Before arriving to this sun-drenched intellectual oasis we refer to as the University of California, Santa Barbara, I served time - two whole years of it - at a community college three minutes away fr...
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Wait, the Super Bowl is Sunday?

February 3, 2006 by

Shit, who's playing?
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Historic Free Box Needs Repair

February 3, 2006 by Jenny Jett

Most long-time I.V. residents are familiar with the Free Box, but for those of you who are just beginning your Isla Vista experience, take a peek some day in front of the Isla Vista Recreation and Par...
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Frozen Gamete Gamble

February 2, 2006 by Nick Pasto

Would you call me a creep if I told you that I keep my leftover semen in jars in my refrigerator? You would? Well, don't worry, I don't actually keep my sperm in the refrigerator. I keep it in the fre...
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Just in Time!

February 2, 2006 by

It's a miracle! Both the new Arbor and the highly touted Broida Expressway are finally completed. Just in time! We were looking forward to using them ... two years ago (slight exaggeration).
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Local Mourns In Evil’s Aftermath

February 2, 2006 by Henry Sarria

This week I was going to write about a comparison of the Palestinian elections to the ABC hit show, "Dancing with the Stars." Not to trivialize a historical event in our time, but, with all said and d...
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Time Well Managed Means Excluding Edward Forty-Hands

February 2, 2006 by Colin Marshall

"Edward Forty-Hands" is played thusly: The participant's buddies duct tape a pair of cheap malt liquors to his hands. Said participant cannot, until the combined 80 oz. are imbibed, remove the bottles...
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Gaucho Marketing Department Must Get Off the Bench

February 2, 2006 by Reza Garajedaghi

Last Saturday, UCSB's men's basketball game versus the University of the Pacific (UOP) was broadcast on FOX Sports West. I attended the game but watched the taped version when I got home. What brings ...
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Wiretaps Abuse Rights

February 1, 2006 by Patrick Donahoe

If you've walked through the arbor during the last few weeks, you've probably seen me. I'm the guy in the cowboy hat proclaiming, "Impeach Bush, save the Constitution" at the top of his lungs. I haven...
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So Long, Menehunes

February 1, 2006 by

Today the 'human had a portion of itself ripped out, as it saw workers physically ripping apart the late Menehunes.
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Racism Saturates Our Politics

February 1, 2006 by Henry Sarria

Race and racism are never easy topics to discuss, and good reasons exist for this fact. Some people do tend to get so emotional about the subject that the discussion becomes a rash of rhetoric. On a l...
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How to Elevate Simple Excuses to Extraordinary Excuses

February 1, 2006 by Nick Pasto

I like to make excuses when confronted with annoying questions relating to various responsibilities that I've neglected. "Nick, why didn't you turn in the homework assignment?" Because my dog ate my h...
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Author Argues Against Idea That Opiates Are Appealing

February 1, 2006 by Jake Lehman

I was quite appalled at Kaitlin Lawler's unbridled encouragement of opiate use in her article, "Don't Pass Up Poppies" (Daily Nexus, Feb. 28). And then I realized it was but a mere sophomoric joke, wr...
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