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Terrorist Tom Brady Threatens Safety of the U.S.

January 25, 2008 by Daniel Plotkin

I am angry with the United States government for harboring the single greatest terrorist this nation has ever seen: Tom Brady.
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Good Planning Beats Any Drug Test

January 24, 2008 by Jeff Gibson

Stale urine trickled down the inside of his leg a drop at a time, eventually soaking the black dress socks he'd just bought that morning. He would have laughed if it wasn't for the tension in the offi...
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Brooklyn Bang Dance

January 24, 2008 by Staff

Dear Weatherprofessors, Due to the unusual amount of rain, I will not be attending classes until further notice. I realize that my absence will be missed, particularly in my [class name removed by edi...
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Frimpong Defenders Ignore Court Facts

January 24, 2008 by James Baron

Eric Frimpong has been convicted of rape. This comes as no surprise to anyone with half a brain. The evidence against him was overwhelming: teeth marks consistent with his on the victim's face, witnes...
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Think!

January 24, 2008 by Staff

Break All the Rules in City of Sin

January 23, 2008 by Dana Olsen

I don’t like blackjack. I’ve never played craps in my life. I’m not a fan of Celine Dion, Barry Manilow or any other semiretired headliner at Caesars Palace. However, there is one re...
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Seasoned Surprise

January 23, 2008 by Staff

I went to Jack in the Box for dinner last night, and what did I find in my seasoned curlies? Not one, but TWO regular fries! This is absolutely the best thing that can happen during a meal. If you ord...
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Customers Tip More Often Than Earned

January 23, 2008 by Robby Greengold

As an employee of the food service industry, it astounds me to see so many people cave in to social pressure. In this country, tips are expected to be given liberally to people holding arbitrary jobs ...
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Volatile Sake Bomb Drops Into Isla Vista

January 23, 2008 by Ray Collins

When I say “Sake,” you say “Bomb!” Sake! Bomb! Sake! Bomb! Sake! BOMB! Sake bombs are a fun way to get blitzed with your friends. You may be wondering, what exactly is a sake b...
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Organizers Offer Apology for Hillary Rally Blunder

January 23, 2008 by Staff

Editor, Daily Nexus, Hillary Clinton came to Santa Barbara with a goal in mind; she wanted to hold a personalized town hall meeting focusing on the students at UCSB. We, as the California campaign dir...
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Roe v. Wade Still Deserves Protection After 35 Years

January 23, 2008 by Staff

Editor, Daily Nexus, As a young, educated, sexually active woman, I believe that it is important to speak out in support of women’s reproductive rights and do all we can to protect them. At pres...
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Rallies Showcase Governing Style

January 22, 2008 by Eric Goldman

"Let's have a conversation," Hillary Clinton proposed to the crowd of mostly UCSB students and Santa Barbara locals, utilizing a line she used to kick off her campaign in a videotaped message on Hilla...
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Mile High Flub

January 22, 2008 by The Weatherhuman

An online survey found that two-thirds of Australian travelers want to join the Mile High Club. It’s hard to believe that a third of the respondents said no, although I guess I can see what thei...
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State Repubs Shaft Independent Voters

January 22, 2008 by Jeff Dulgar

Far too often, "Conservative" and "Republican" are thought to be synonymous. However, if your views lean to the right, you are not confined to the Republican Party.
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