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Black and White and Dead All Over

January 8, 2009 by Staff

So, we're kind of out of money. The headline and accompanying art might be a little dramatic, but with an awful economy, rising cost of newsprint and ink and declining revenue from advertisements, we'...
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Israel Must Protect Itself

January 8, 2009 by Alan Levine

The current Israel-Hamas conflict took form in 2001, when Hamas began to fire rockets from Gaza into southern Israel, not at military targets, but at random. They would often hit open fields, but as t...
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Escape the Isla Vista Bubble

January 8, 2009 by Jimmy Fremgen

I'm just back from Scotland and settling into my old routine. I moved about six feet to the apartment next door, applied for my old job and last, but certainly not least, returned to this little oppor...
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Voluptuous Virtual Voyages

January 7, 2009 by Jenni Perez

I got laid this Winter Break. Trust me, this was to everyone’s advantage; all play and no lay makes Jenni a raging psycho. Last year, I stormed my hometown with a permanent stink-eye, obsessivel...
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I Can Has Student Fees?

January 7, 2009 by The Weatherhuman

Am I the only one who picked up a free notebook from A.S. today? By free, I of course mean something I unknowingly paid for months ago via my student fees.
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I’d Like to Get to Know You in a Meteorological Kind of Way

January 6, 2009 by The Weatherhuman

I'm so nervous. I have my first section today.
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Wacko Tobacco

January 6, 2009 by Alex Coffman

I’ve recently discovered one of the most wonderful, fun, uplifting, abused drugs around. No, it’s not cocaine. It’s not speed. It’s tobacco! This “recreational” dru...
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Self-Proclaimed Bromaster Gives Best Advice

January 6, 2009 by Keyvan S.

How many of you are trying to get laid every weekend? How many of you are trying to get laid every weekend, but failing miserably? And how many of you have an STD because you’re getting laid way...
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Pappas Won’t Back Down

January 5, 2009 by Staff

Steve Pappas has been busy. While you were sipping hot chocolate by the fire on your much-deserved break, Steve Pappas was meticulously recounting Isla Vista votes. While you were watching Ryan Seacr...
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New Year’s Resolution

January 5, 2009 by The Weatherhuman

Happy New Year everyone! I don't know about y'all, but the 'human has a multi-phase resolution ready to go.
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Voter Turnout Seems Suspect

January 5, 2009 by Ryan P. McNicholas

UCSB was one of the best campuses in the country in regard to registering students to vote. Also, we had the highest turnout on any college campus in the country. How do I know this? Because our schoo...
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Turds and Tulips

December 4, 2008 by Staff

Correction added Puffy-chested, proud tulips to the firefighters who kept the Tea Fire from lighting all of Santa Barbara County on fire, and to the community members, groups and businesses who opened...
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Fox News

December 4, 2008 by Staff

Being on a liberal, pink-o commie campus all the time, sometimes I feel like I don't get enough propaganda from the other side. Thus, I occasionally frequent foxnews.com. It gives me my share of real,...
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Thief-Proof Your Pad Before Heading Home

December 4, 2008 by Mark Signa

Wow, the quarter's almost over already. It feels like it was the last day of summer break only a few weeks ago. Halloween came and went faster than a Friday night streaker on Del Playa. Now the holida...
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Ailing Economy Aches for Long-Term Fix

December 4, 2008 by Steven Begakis

The news media has recently focused its attention on Barack Obama's choice of his previous arch nemesis, Hilary Clinton, for Secretary of State. While a significant cabinet pick, might I suggest that ...
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