Zac Gates

February 2, 2011

The Stakes Are High

By Zac Gates, Carly Bonilla-Flores, Bob Samuels

UC Administrators and State Leaders Gamble with Higher Education...

February 19, 2010

Dear Hippies: Please Take a Bath and Shut Up

By Zac Gates

Hippies are annoying. And they smell. Has it ever occurred to you -- as some dreadlocked scallywag is screaming "WAR CRIMINAL" or "DOWN WITH OLD SPICE" -- that it's very hard to find someone who actually cares?

November 13, 2009

Greedy Gaucho Wants Ire of Minority Groups All to Himself

By Zac Gates

As I walk up and down the paths of this illustrious university, I can't help but notice a sort of mollifying, yet bitterly pungent aura; an aura that reeks of emotionally-driven bilge. One might blame right-wingers who a...

November 14, 2008

I Voted “Yes” on Prop 8 And I Am Not Ashamed

By Zac Gates

Editor, Daily Nexus, I voted "Yes" on Prop 8. Sue me. By proclaiming my vote, you'd think I'd just thrown a newspaper in a trash can instead of a recycling container, based on the reaction of others here at UCSB. Crazy,...

October 24, 2008

Right Need Not Fear The One

By Zac Gates

We are the future, fighting to cement the inevitable phenomenon known as "change" into the mind of every American soul. It is time we step foot onto the Ship of Hope and set sail for a new land of egalitarianism. The cha...

September 30, 2008

Left Should Rethink Market Ideas

By Zac Gates

Amid the luring reminders of the left that capitalism is evil, wealthy entrepreneurs are greedy, and George W. Bush is a big fat idiot, there is one beacon of light that leads me away from the sycophantic saps: basic eco...

May 7, 2008

Radical Connections Tarnish Obama’s “New” Politics

By Zac Gates

I have been quiet lately. For the past few weeks, I have remained in the shadows, reluctant to intercede in shoddy debate. My days have consisted of watching Fox News, reading a copious amount of political columns and tr...

April 4, 2008

Loser Libs Forge a Path for Mighty Mac

By Zac Gates

Goodness gracious, the tides are beginning to turn! Good news, fellow conservatives: The Democratic Party is on the verge of implosion.

February 26, 2008

Good Sense Hinders Ability to Obamasm

By Zac Gates

The Center for Disease Control would like to bring you a special emergency warning: You could be at risk for a terrible disease! All concerned citizens should read the following column carefully - even your children may ...

February 1, 2008

True Change Requires the Restoration of Reaganomics

By Zac Gates

Forgive me for epitomizing the typical American flag-wielding patriot on an everyday basis, but I see the act of expressing good ol' American patriotism as an essential, since this nation could possibly be heading down a...