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Rent Control

October 12, 2001 by Staff

There is an apartment building on Abrego called "Casa Dinero Perdido." The weathermate tells me that this translates roughly from Spanish as "the house of lost money."
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10 Clowns Slither Onstage at Goleta Circus

October 12, 2001 by Brendan Buhler

Ten people are running for five city council seats in a non-existent city that will probably go broke.
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Ugly Exteriors Hide the Hidden Beauty of UCSB

October 11, 2001 by Josh Braun

In architecture, they have a saying: "Form follows Function." Lately, when I look at our campus, I get the feeling that Form is trailing somewhere off in the distance. More likely it fell off a cliff ...
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D’oh!

October 11, 2001 by Staff

The Simpsons was my only break in a long strenuous day of meteorological study and gesturing in front of a blue screen. Yes, yes I know there is one episode at 6- but really, is that enough?
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Preservation Isn’t Just for the Birds

October 11, 2001 by Eric Cardenas

I ask the question, "Isn't it possible to provide protection for the plover while still providing for human use?"
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Pernicious Plover Ploy

October 10, 2001 by Henry Sarria

At what point does environmental concern become a threat to the environmentalism itself? When it's mixed with hypocrisy, for starters.
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Weather Palace

October 10, 2001 by Staff

I am lazy. The weathercave is cold in the winter and hot in the summer with extremely poor plumbing. On the bright side, it’s stationary. All I ask for is a home without wheels. So, while the we...
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Sidewalk Writing Stinks – Chalk It Up to Stupidity

October 10, 2001 by David Downs

Civil Rights are evaporating fast and I'm tempted to agree with an unconstitutional amendment. Campus would be much less annoying if we flogged every half-assed activist chalking dumb sidewalk slogans...
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Learn to Love Lingerie

October 10, 2001 by Molly Blank

Let your lingerie prove that beauty really does come from within.
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Don’t Believe the Media Machine; This War Is About Oil Interests

October 10, 2001 by David Weston

Oil has been and always will be the United States' only objective in the Middle East.
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If You Try Sometimes, You Just Might Find You Care About Stuff

October 10, 2001 by Staff

Apathy molests all of us at some point, but motivating yourself off your ass would likely make your life more fun and meaningful.
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Checkmate or Stalemate?

October 9, 2001 by Staff

Blowing up bits of Afghanistan may be satisfying, but will it accomplish anything?
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You’re Like, Famous

October 9, 2001 by Staff

I successfully resisted the urge to say painfully obvious things to him such as, "You're Dennis Miller," or "You really sucked on Monday Night Football."
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To All the Contra Fans In the House

October 9, 2001 by Staff

I’m terribly disappointed with the camera resolution on the latest war. CNN footage looked like a close-up shot of slowing elephant dung. For the billions we drop in defense, we deserve satellit...
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Not Acronym Crazy? Live With It and Make Up Some of Your Own

October 9, 2001 by Staff

In my five years at UCSB, I have yet to find the "prize-winning science department." I've seen the prize-winning chemistry department, and the prize-winning physics department, but I can't seem to fin...
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