Mind, Body & Soul

Where to Turn When BROing and HOing Have Lost Their Appeal

April 25, 2012 by

Most unfortunately, in order to speak of this next topic, I will have to address something fetid and repulsive. I’m going to talk about an aspect of intercourse that is often lost, forgotten, feared...
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I Never Tell a Lie, Except for Those Times When I Do

April 18, 2012 by

The average person tells seven lies a day. I’m not sure if I read that from a Snapple fact or if I just made that up. But anyway, I didn’t believe it at first, until I started listening to half th...
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Don’t Base Your Desires on the Gender Binary: Go For What Gets You Off

April 11, 2012 by

Nation. People. Literate UCSB students. I come before you today to offer a study that will revolutionize science. Its elegance, infallibility, and pure genius will force the Nobel committee to establi...
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The Roommate Double-Double: Careful Where That Appetite Takes You

April 4, 2012 by

Logic is the devil of language. And you want to know why? Because it would make perfect sense for you to fall in love with your hookup’s roommate. Talk about a classic mix-up. Have you ever woken up...
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Sexuality and Flexibility: No, No, Not That Kind of Flexibility

March 7, 2012 by

I spent a long while trying to think of what to write for my first sex article for the Daily Nexus, and as I thought about it, I was forced to think about what, exactly, a sex article should cover. T...
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The Six Degrees of Isla Vista: You Wish It Were Only A Theory

February 22, 2012 by

Have you ever been sitting around, shootin’ the shit with your friends, when all of a sudden you stop and realize you’ve all essentially hooked up with one another? All right, before you judge me,...
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She Said: “Looking like you don’t give a fuck that you’re not getting fucked is difficult.”

February 15, 2012 by

Valentine’s Day is over, and thank God for that. I’m not even talking about the relationship bullshit (well, not yet anyway). Now that the girls of I.V. are finally off the gluten/dairy/sugar-free...
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“I’m Rooting for Peyton Manning”

February 8, 2012 by

Watching the Super Bowl for girls is like watching the WNBA … for anyone. We hate it, we really do. But we’d never tell you that. In fact, we spend our entire Super Bowl Sunday attempting to show ...
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“I’m Not a Slut, I Swear” and Other Bedroom Mantras

February 1, 2012 by

“Shit Girls Say” started an epidemic. I just watched “Shit People Say About Shit People Say Videos” for a solid minute and 39 seconds; yeah, it’s gotten to that point. But you know what they...
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Booty Texting: How to Send the Right Message

January 25, 2012 by

We’ve all been guilty of booty calling. Or maybe not, but your day of shame will come, young grasshopper. “Hey, what are you doing,” “Where are you?” “Wanna hang?” all sound innocent …...
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Don’t Chase Shots, Chase Jerseys: How to Land Yourself One

January 18, 2012 by

So listen, syllabus week is over. It’s time to get your shit together. No, I’m not talking about getting your books, stop that. Do you know me at all? No, it’s Christmas season round 2: winter s...
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Home Is Where the Heart Is, Not to Mention the Hassle-Free Lay

January 11, 2012 by

So now that you’ve gotten through the holidays, and hopefully entered into the New Year with a bang (hey, you deserve it!), it’s back to reality. And for some of us, thankfully, the lives we would...
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Exercise Logic: Work Hard Now for Easy Booty Later

November 23, 2011 by

I was in class last week reading a texting conversation over this guy’s shoulder (stop judging me) where he was trying to hang on to his fuck buddy here in I.V. while simultaneously texting his ex-g...
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Road (Construction A)head

November 15, 2011 by and

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Even Expert Scoundrals Must Strategize to Maximize Booty

November 9, 2011 by and

Sometimes getting laid isn’t the problem; the problem is answering the booty call. No, I’m not talking about the girls who fight with themselves about their morals at 2:30 in the morning: “I’m...
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