Weather

Demand the Best – Demand Vermont

February 11, 2004 by

Have you seen these late-night commercials hawking Vermont Teddy Bears? The commercials promise top-quality stuffed bears, "actually made in Vermont."
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Russert Probes Bush in Oval Office

February 10, 2004 by

Can you believe the balls on NBC? A week after CBS causes super-frenzy by showing Janet's boob for a split second, the Peacock answers with the most vulgar thing they can come up with: An hour long cl...
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Puff, Puff, Pass/No Pass

February 9, 2004 by

I was sitting on the couch and one of my friends said something about it being my pass time. I was angrily telling him I'd barely even hit the mofo once, let alone twice, and how I've killed people fo...
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Schmuck Hunt

February 6, 2004 by

Dick Cheney took the judge handling his Supreme Court case out for a hunting trip. They are saying this might, just might, constitute a conflict of interest. I'd say it does.
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Bozo Goes to Washington

February 5, 2004 by

Martha Stewart is getting ratted out by a temp who overheard some insider trading action. She should have known trusting one of those urban drifters was not a good thing - they'll drop dime quicker th...
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Super Stupor, Floppy Hooter

February 4, 2004 by

How about Janet Jackson's righty? That thing was corny looking. It looked like one of those fake feet that people have hanging out of their car trunk.
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Our Mamas Didn’t Want Us

February 3, 2004 by

Yeah, I flaked and passed out before I filled yesterday's box. But, hey, everyone makes mistakes - this office is full of them. Thanks to the 'neanderthal for filling yesterday's space and the morons ...
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Slope-browed Interlude

February 2, 2004 by

Dear readers, the Weatherhuman was not to be found on Superbowl Sunday, most likely because the human was not answering the phone at the Fortress of Inebriation.
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Houston… Hellhole! Hut! Hike!

January 30, 2004 by

The only forecasting that matters now is the Super Bowl kind.
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Get Off His Ass

January 28, 2004 by

The 3rd district election is getting ugly as the opposition is trying to sully John Buttny's name. And I don't mean by calling him Assny.
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Testing, 1, 2, 5

January 28, 2004 by

Carpinteria High School just became the first school in the county to test students for drugs. Each week a computer will pick five students from a list of the kids participating in sports or cheerlead...
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Regulation Aggravation

January 27, 2004 by

After we finished a game of pool at the UCen yesterday, my colleague pulled a cigarette out of his case, presumably to help him calm down after the savage trouncing he received on the felt. We grabbe...
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Tap Cola

January 26, 2004 by

It was on this date in 1945 that a city in Michigan became the first to put fluoride in its tap water. I mention it because the 'human drinks tap water like it was, uh, water, and I like to brag about...
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