Martha Stewart is getting ratted out by a temp who overheard some insider trading action. She should have known trusting one of those urban drifters was not a good thing – they’ll drop dime quicker than John Kerry can make a baby cry.

But a portrait of the “clown-on-downers” look on Kerry’s face will look nice hanging in the Democratic Hall of Shame. It already boasts an impressive collection, including the actual circuit board that went haywire in Dean-bot’s CPU and a remarkably life-like statue of Al Gore. That damn thing even leaves the room to use the john once in a while.

Thursday’s forecast: The 2000 campaign proved that people vastly prefer the “clown-on-uppers” look.