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Montecitans Don’t Like 101? Let Them Eat Asphalt

January 17, 2002 by Henry Sarria

Aesthetics don't necessarily equate to function. Just because something looks nice it doesn't mean that it'll actually work or that the problems of the past will magically go away.
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If You Think Celebrities Are Paid Too Much, Don’t Help Pay Them

January 17, 2002 by Jason La

The public has no right to dictate where corporations should funnel their money unless you are a shareholder, nor does it make any sense to do so.
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CIA Spies Persians With Its Blind Eye

January 16, 2002 by Ladan Moeenziai

The Los Angeles Times reported that, in an attempt to keep their eye on the activities of Iran, the CIA has reassigned a number of its spies to the heavily Iranian-populated city of Los Angeles.
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Lecture Hall Hygiene

January 16, 2002 by Staff

There is no polite way to tell someone their stench is suffocating.
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It May Be Really Weird, but RealDolls Mean Sex to Some

January 16, 2002 by Sarah Kent

From dildos to rubber vaginas, inflatable women to inflatable sheep, sex with the synthetic is offered as an alternative or a supplement to "normal" sexual activity.
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Think New Books Are a Rip-off? Then Photocopy Your Material

January 16, 2002 by Jon Getty

Writers like Ted Andersen (Daily Nexus, "Selling Off Your Arm, Leg and Spleen for a Quality Education," Jan. 15) need to fundamentally reconsider how they buy books.
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Billions Can’t Buy Beaches

January 15, 2002 by Staff

It's probably wrong to gloat when other people fail, but when a billionaire fails to keep the public off of the beach in front of her 25-acre estate, it's hard not to gloat.
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Living Without Vowels: See the Rats Scurry From Enron’s Sinking Ship

January 15, 2002 by Steven Ruszczycky

Perhaps most interesting is the uncanny ability of rats to jump ship when the vessel faces imminent doom. However, when the good ship Enron started taking on water, the government decided to ignore th...
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Selling Off Your Arm, Leg and Spleen for a Quality Education

January 15, 2002 by Ted Andersen

I walked into the Isla Vista Bookstore on Monday afternoon with a bantamweight bank account and high hopes. I left a half an hour later a confused and broken man.
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Comics: thINK

January 15, 2002 by Staff

If You’ll Recall, I Had Nothing to Do With It

January 14, 2002 by Jim Thomas

There have been a few letters suggesting I have played a pivotal role in the Goleta Project Area Committee flag incident and the recall efforts of 3rd District Supervisor Gail Marshall.
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The Cart of Darkness

January 14, 2002 by Staff

There are many professions which deal with the dark aspects of humanity: doctors, divorce lawyers and journalists are just a few.
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They’re a Deal at $130.

January 14, 2002 by Staff

Sneakers reached the limits of tasteful, sensible design in the late eighties. Since then sneakers have splintered into the cross trainer, the tennis shoe, the basketball shoe ...
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Red Tape: Above Streetlights, Bathed in Starlight

January 14, 2002 by Josh Braun

At the coastline, sailboats and oil platforms take up the shining torch, stretching out toward the horizon where they meet the sky, and turn the entire world into one giant field of stars.
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No One’s Genitals Are the Property of Someone Else

January 11, 2002 by Theo Baker

Your boyfriend's penis is not "your penis." It is HIS penis and it was his penis long before you two began sleeping together. And he will most likely share his penis with others after you two break up...
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