Opinion

November 28, 2001

Weather: We’re The Golden Children Turning Bronze

By Staff

The Hometown WeatherQuintilogy: #3 Santa Barbara is too expensive for people with actual problems. Ridiculous local apartment rents equal a house mortgage in any rural shithole, so you can’t afford a severe psychos...

November 28, 2001

Rughe Elephant

By Staff

The Lompoc Economic Development Committee member is in trouble for sending letters to south coast newspapers, stating that "Muslims are out to destroy our world."

November 28, 2001

Please, Please, Please Gimme Some o’ Dat Plover Lovin’, Baby

By David Downs

Beach coitus interrupted by a Frisbee to the dome is harsh for any species, but the snowy plovers, whose breeding problems have closed Sands Beach, will get no sympathy from me.

November 28, 2001

Something for Which To Give Thanks

By Leila Drake

Thanksgiving meant something very different to me this year than it has before. I was the victim of the first reported sexual assault this year, on Sept. 23, but this incident has had a very different effect on me than I...

November 27, 2001

There’s Something Fishy About Rigs to Reef

By Eric Simons

California's been trying to decide whether to allow oil companies to convert their used oil platforms to artificial reefs for several years, and in the latest development, the governor vetoed a bill with the explanation ...

November 27, 2001

Drugs, Babies and Marriage

By Staff

Going home is always heavy. Friends and family can really jack up their lives while you’re away. I’ve found the majority of the hometown heaviness involves just three things: Drugs, babies or marriage. Someti...

November 27, 2001

Living Without Vowels: New Law Is a Smoke Screen for Stupidity

By Steven Ruszczycky

The board of supervisors just handed Santa Barbara County residents a 20-foot length of hose and told them to go blow smoke up their butts.

November 27, 2001

We Can’t Afford High Rents for Grad Students

By Edward Collins

Higher rental fees incurred by graduate and undergraduate students slow their academic progress and discourage them from applying to UCSB.

November 26, 2001

Jesus Mutants!

By Staff

My home town is full of mutant people! Obese mutants! Acned mutants! Jesus mutants! Mutated Mutants! Witness to such perverse genetic disaster require months of trauma counseling among Santa Barbara’s tanned and to...

November 26, 2001

Red Tape: We’ve All Got Tickets for the Attack of the Clones

By Josh Braun

U.S. politicians have generally agreed, to the point of grandstanding at times, that cloning a human would be an unconscionable and unethical act. They just never got around to outlawing it.

November 26, 2001

Sands Beach Closure Leaves Room for Plovers and People

By Darlene Chirman

A rope-and-post fence will delineate a 1,300-foot long area, to direct people around the roost on the wet sand. This will protect 90 percent of the roost area. The majority of the beach is still available for recreationa...

November 26, 2001

Free of Goleta, We Can Label Our Town Isla Vista With Pride

By Temmo Korisheli

Well at least one good thing may come out of the recent Goleta cityhood vote.

November 21, 2001

It Was Only 10-3

By Staff

Here at the Nexus, we believe in giving credit where credit is due. In the traditional Nexus sloshball game against A.S., held last weekend, there was much that was deserving. For example: although there were at least 10...

November 21, 2001

Don’t Get Spoon-fed News About the War in Afghanistan

By Drew Atkins

When people cease to point out our government's faults, usually because they fear the response from others, they give up control over their government's actions.

November 21, 2001

There’s No Beating Around the Nuclear Secrets, Bush

By David Downs

Let us all give thanks this week. We don't live in a nuke-worthy city, we're not on any government dissident lists, we will remain blissfully ignorant of how jacked up the world is becoming.

November 21, 2001

Stop Your Complaining and Whining; Back Up Your Beliefs

By Loren Williams

I've heard variations on "America - love it or leave it" far too often recently. It's amazing that people can claim to be patriotic and simultaneously be so ignorant of the values for which our country stands.