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Get Sloshed in the Shower

January 27, 2005 by Sean Swaby

Throughout time, man has attempted to conquer the elements. When we were young'uns, we would dash from spa to pool for hours on end trying to reach that perfect equilibrium. In reality, all that accom...
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One Nation Under the Influence

January 27, 2005 by Staff

According to the all-knowing TVs in the UCen, about 0.7 percent of the world's population is drunk at any given moment. That's a lot of drunk people - over 40 million - enough to form an entire countr...
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Join The Mudslinging Circus Today!

January 27, 2005 by Brigid Kirlin

Sometimes I wonder if I am the only person who feels that the American political landscape is becoming more of a ridiculous three-ring circus than a sophisticated and issue-based debate. Too many Amer...
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The Linguistics of Love

January 26, 2005 by Dave Franzese

"Penis" is such a gross word. It sounds like it should be the name of some sort of sea creature, probably with tentacles: "The North Atlantic Penis feeds predominantly on small shellfish, and is often...
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Whoa… Story Assignment…

January 26, 2005 by Staff

Dude, there's a correction today. I guess we got a bit confused while reporting on the joint-rolling contest. Let's face it... all the joints were pretty damn good.
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Globalization Alone Won’t Save Poor Economies

January 26, 2005 by Elia Boggia

Breezing through Alec Mouhibian's latest column titled ("Private Dancer: Wake Up, Progressives," Daily Nexus, Jan 24), one can only spread himself in the comfort of his lawn chair, take another sip of...
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Props to the Students Who Really Soldier Through College

January 26, 2005 by Christopher Rice

In a neighborhood of unmotivated, beer-drinking college misfits, it's hard to imagine a successful program based on dedication and responsibility, yet nestled behind Campbell Hall is a building that h...
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Help Rescue the Women’s Center From Ruthless Budget Cuts

January 26, 2005 by Megan Arch

As many of us have noted in the last couple of years or so, the priorities of our national and state governments have shifted away from the needs of university students.
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Don’t Let Naivet

January 26, 2005 by Ryan Gardner

This letter is in response to Monday's letter ("Egocentric Dems Should Accept Election Results, Daily Nexus, Jan. 24). I appreciate the fact that the letter expressed a valid opinion and should be hea...
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He Said, She Said: Network Leaves a World of Possibilities at Your Fingertips

January 25, 2005 by Drew Mackie

My phone vibrates in my pocket. I pull it out to find I have been "poked" by someone with an unfamiliar name. I feel dirty. Some stranger has extended a digital finger and caused a brief rumbling sens...
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Made in the Storke Socialist Republic

January 25, 2005 by Staff

I already thought "What Not to Wear" was a pretty socialist show, but North Korea has taken it one step further with its new TV series, "Let Us Trim Our Hair in Accordance With Socialist Lifestyle."
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He Said, She Said: Internet Shenanigans Are Eerily Reminiscent of High School

January 25, 2005 by Kristen Richer

As a toddler, I was shy. I spoke only when spoken to - if then - and as my mother taught me, I was leery of strangers.
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May I Suggest Canada for Bush-Bashers?

January 25, 2005 by Patrick Callahan

Ah, the fresh smell of victory. There's nothing like waking up to hear "President Bush's Second Inauguration" on any given news channel. This is the face of democracy. The Democrats thought they had i...
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Private Dancer: Wake Up, Progressives

January 24, 2005 by Alec Mouhibian

The progressive movement sprouted from the idea that the world would really get somewhere if only everybody would let their lives be run by progressives. Central to the idea was a centralized and empo...
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Penny for My Thoughts

January 24, 2005 by Staff

I hate pennies. They're like the quick-breeding, out-of-control bunnies of the monetary world. Back in 2001, one courageous congressman, Jim Kolbe (R-Ariz.), introduced legislation calling for its eli...
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