Everything I’ve ever wanted to say to stinky little campus tour groups

April 27, 2023 by

I have had ENOUGH of not being able to suntan at the lagoon without a prepubescent fifth grader staring at my ass.
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UCSB students to be featured in Thanksgiving Day Parade

November 30, 2022 by

“We just really love parades,” club founder Turr Keybut explained. “They’re the only part of life that goes by slowly. Sometimes, you just have to appreciate that about them.”
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SWAT team surrounds apartment of UCSB student who took more than one apple from DLG

October 11, 2022 by

These kids need to stop expecting us to feed them all the time, who do they think we are? Also, we’re never bringing Late Night back so stop asking.
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