Brendan Buhler

October 2, 2002

Oh, Won’t Somebody Please Think of the Grizzly Bears?

By Brendan Buhler

The clamor of the morning zoo rumbles from each car as horns blare, windows lower, doors pop open and hundreds of commuters scream. The grizzly bears are going to work.

August 28, 2002

Expert Declares Lagoon Healthy Despite Odor

By Brendan Buhler

It's too shallow to swim in (not that you would want to), it's too salty to drink (assuming you could ignore the scum), and the dock is disconnected (covered in bird droppings, too).

August 28, 2002

Here It Comes, Here It Comes, Heeeere It Comes…

By Brendan Buhler

Hello. Hmm. There's a lot of space left. I'd better change that subhead to read "A Few Words..."

June 26, 2002

Goleta’s New Paper Hits Newstands

By Brendan Buhler

The South Coast Beacon is two issues old today. Tom Bolton and William Macfadyen, the two top editors at a paper of 18, try to explain why they started a 20,000-circulation paper for the new city of Goleta.

May 10, 2002

The Best Anniversary Gifts Are Fire and Flood

By Brendan Buhler

When the date approaches and your steely eyed girlfriend wonders just what you have in store for her, you plan. While no man wishes for war or anniversaries, they are thrust upon us for the preservation of all we cherish...

May 3, 2002

Wily Vipers Burn Associated Students Behind Them

By Brendan Buhler

In tactics reminiscent of Marshal Georgi K. Zhukov's, Representative Martin T. Doyle is burning every financial field and shooting every cash cow that SAC forces could find useful, and a great deal besides.

May 1, 2002

Chris Isaak | Always Got Tonight | Reprise

By Brendan Buhler

Chris Isaak's most polished album is also one of his best, focusing more on Roy Orbison-style rock 'n' roll than broken-hearted ballads.

April 19, 2002

Candidates

By Brendan Buhler, Steven Ruszczycky

If you ask Maggie Stack what the most important thing an Associated Students president can do, she says, "Go to committee meetings."

April 19, 2002

Policy Endorsements

By Brendan Buhler, Steven Ruszczycky

Sports and activity facility fee

April 12, 2002

The Sequining Sight of Campus Elections

By Brendan Buhler

It's election season on campus, which is sort of like figure skating season. You look up one day and say, "oh, that again." Like figure skating, the rules and point of the sport are vague, there's lots of twirling and wo...

March 7, 2002

No Phone, No Pool, No Pets, Ain’t Got No Cigarettes

By Brendan Buhler

Activists for Isla Vista's homeless community can't always get what they want. But if they try sometimes, they might just find they get the last thing they want.

February 22, 2002

Mongoose: Don’t Be Sheep, Recall is About Cows

By Brendan Buhler

The No On Recall folks have a point when they say that the recall campaign is backed by a shadowy cabal of Isla Vista's landlord scum - there are two of them and as of December they contributed a whopping 2.8 percent of ...

February 8, 2002

Three Snakes Devour Ellwood – Kinda

By Brendan Buhler

The Ellwood Bluffs are going to get screwed up - just not as badly as before.

February 7, 2002

Carrot Blows His Top

By Brendan Buhler

In which your Artsweek heroes sap a 33-year-old prop comic's will to live, he tells us to go fuck ourselves and cancels his Santa Barbara performance.

January 31, 2002

Book Review: Carl Hiaasen | Basket Case

By Brendan Buhler

Basket Case is about journalism, rock 'n' roll and mortality, plus a bit of sex from the lower end of the R rating. Because it's a novel by Carl Hiaasen, it's also funny as hell.

January 24, 2002