David Downs

October 16, 2003

Room for One More Star?

By David Downs

The 51st state of the union will not be Puerto Rico or even American Samoa. It will be a sand-filled, terrorist incubator that will make those Islamic schools in Pakistan look like an alternative kindergarten in Marin Co...

October 1, 2003

War, Recall and Hell’s Hostile Takeover of Earth

By David Downs

Truth may be the first casualty of war, but just because it's dead doesn't mean you have to drag it down the street with its guts trailing behind it as double-jawed hyenas gnaw on the gristle.

May 23, 2002

Minority Retort

By David Downs

Today's Digital Video Festival at 7 p.m. in I.V. Theater will showcase 13 shorts brought to you by the Digital Video Association of UCSB.

May 15, 2002

Alienating Ant Farm

By David Downs

Call him the "Ambassador of Anomie," maybe even the "Duke of Desolation." Just please stop calling him, "that guy who painted 'Nighthawks.'"

May 1, 2002

‘For the Love of God, Die Already’

By David Downs

The only thing more shameful than a "Friday the 13th" part 10 is Artsweek, which spent almost two hours of its Tuesday evening trashing "Jason X."

April 24, 2002

Heavy Mettle

By David Downs

Justice for David Attias' victims won't end with a lengthy sentence from the court, but it may start with a monologue in Snidecor Hall.

April 19, 2002

420 Fans Toke, Muse

By David Downs

The stoner attack hit Isla Vista's Espresso Roma around 4:40 p.m. Saturday when hordes of glassy-eyed revelers from the Fourth Annual 420-Fest in Anisq' Oyo' Park streamed in oohing and ahhing at Roma's shiny display of ...

April 18, 2002

Bathtub Film Festival

By David Downs

I Love Adolph Hilter co-producer Matt Wienglass says his 4/20 showing of seven experimental films in I.V. Theater has a drug theme corresponding with the worldwide smoke-out, but it's in no way limited to dopes.

April 18, 2002

Blackalicious | Blazing Arrow | MCA

By David Downs

Blackalicious’ only crime on Blazing Arrow is that its CD is too fucking good. The rhymes set the ears a-tingle and the frontal lobes afire. The beats blur genres and demand bass knobs turned to the left. Most kids...

April 11, 2002

My Vagina Is Angry And It Needs To Talk

By David Downs

UCSB's allegedly liberal-minded student body could use a good, hard kick to the cunt, and three professional Vagina Monologists have arrived with their boots on.

April 4, 2002

Literature Blows

By David Downs

"Literary parody and current events parody, mixed in with some fellatio humor; and some of them have plots." So goes author Neal Pollack's synopsis of the very funny and naughty Neal Pollack Anthology of American Literat...

April 4, 2002

Vex Red | Start With a Strong and Persistent Desire | I Am

By David Downs

At it's best, the Hampshire five-piece juxtapose wistful, jaded lyrics and swooshing effects with big-ass "crunch-crunch" noises out of a Korn concert.

March 8, 2002

CIA Memo: Neal Pollack Must Go Down!

By David Downs

Artsweek used its professional training and deep-cover sources of college entertainment journalism to uncover the following triple-stamped, uber-Top Secret CIA communiqu

March 7, 2002

Dabbling in That Magic

By David Downs

A buffet of theatric cuisine awaits drama lovers next week. And a ticket to the student sampler is at everyone's favorite price: free.

February 21, 2002

Brushfire and Water

By David Downs

Eight years ago freshman math major Jack Johnson lived in Anacapa Hall, ate lunch at DLG and joked with his dad about being a rich statistician after college.

February 14, 2002

Breaking Into A (Small) Run

By David Downs

Eggers teased diehard fans with screen shots of pages from his new book, flashing through the blurry and small pages, commenting, "This is when I discovered adjectives. Some of my friends told me that people really like ...