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Show a Little Consideration When You Park Your Automobile

November 21, 2001 by

We've all seen what a bitch it is to park in I.V. I know it's horribly difficult for the car-dependent to drive up and down the street looking for a legal parking space.
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WeatherDefiniton

November 20, 2001 by

The Turkey Drop noun. 1 the cutting of one's losses in mid-November.
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A.S. It Is: The SAT Flunks Out When it Comes to Diversity

November 20, 2001 by

The SAT I has been proven to be culturally biased; its ability to predict the success of a college student is almost insignificant.
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Living Without Vowels: Meet the New Boss in Afghanistan, Same as the Old Boss

November 20, 2001 by

The Northern Alliance isn't your typical Boy Scout troup either. Their treatment of women hasn't been much better than that of the Taliban. Also, they've been devouring the care packages dropped by Am...
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Red Tape: That Kind of Muzak Don’t Soothe the Soul

November 19, 2001 by

Try as I might, I couldn't place it. Then without warning, it happened. The orchestra on the PA system began playing Simon & Garfunkel's "Sounds of Silence."
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Life With Father

November 19, 2001 by

The weatherfather instilled valuable advice via fear. To prevent the weatherchildren from swimming in the lake he described amoebas. Amoebas, as I understood them, were amorphous carnivorous demons fr...
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We Need to Stop Encouraging the ‘Women as Objects’ Mentality

November 19, 2001 by

Maybe if the small portion of our population that has brought so much physical and mental anguish to such a wide audience had imagined their acts being brought upon someone close to them, they would h...
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Chicks on the Beach

November 16, 2001 by

Caring for one of Isla Vista's natural treasures is too important a task to be undertaken without I.V.'s help.
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Print of the Great Pumpkin

November 16, 2001 by

So I have a pumpkin.An eighty-plus pound pumpkin.As giant pumpkins go, I’m told it’s a small one.The pumpkin is sitting in the middle of my living room, but really, the rest of the living ...
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Red Tape: NASA’s New Administrator Could Create a Black Hole of Despair

November 16, 2001 by

NASA's latest expedition is to hell -- in a hand basket.
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Both Taliban, Alliance Mean Cruelty in Afghanistan

November 15, 2001 by

The Revolutionary Association of the Women of Afghanistan, is doing everything it can to remind the world that Afghan women must play a major part in leading their country to peace and democracy.
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Don’t Take the Toothless Hamp-ster Seriously

November 15, 2001 by

Q: How much wood would Associated Students President Brian Hampton chuck if Associated Students President Brian Hampton could chuck wood?
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Right Through the Very Heart of It, New York Came Through

November 14, 2001 by

I must admit that I was never too keen on New York. To me it was an overcrowded freak show with high rents and a high crime rate to boot. There was never any reason for me to even as much as think of ...
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Like butta’, baby! Butta’!

November 14, 2001 by

The skateboarders of Isla Vista officially thank the county for its long-overdue road work.
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The Lown Down: Audit This, California: UC Education System Reeks of Pus

November 14, 2001 by

The Fall Quarter "No Duh!" Award - in the category of "It's About Fucking Time" - goes to State Assemblymember Jenny Oropeza for her brilliant public realization that the UC system is a throbbing, hai...
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