Alec Mouhibian

May 16, 2005

Private Dancer: Moderation Makes for Half-Ass Opinions

By Alec Mouhibian

Whenever I hear the term "moderate" in political parlance, I tend to think of the kind of person who reaches a fork in the road and goes whichever way it's hanging. Or I think of the type who, never able to decide betwee...

May 5, 2005

Private Dancer: Clearing the Angry Air

By Alec Mouhibian

Given the large number of misinterpretations of my last column ("Private Dancer: The Deception Behind Gender Studies," Daily Nexus, April 19), a few things need to be cleared up. First off, there is a reason I referred t...

April 19, 2005

Private Dancer: The Deception Behind Gender Studies

By Alec Mouhibian

I'm not much for playground gender discourse. Men aren't from Mars - and as far as I'm concerned, if women were really from Venus, they'd have three boobs. Yet there are certain phallophobic feminists who've taken the ge...

April 8, 2005

Private Dancer: Arrogant Activism

By Alec Mouhibian

Any remaining notion that modern liberalism is the politics "of the little man" must be retired in light of the open-space agenda. Liberalism is really just the politics of liberals - to impose whatever they deem compass...

February 22, 2005

Private Dancer: Practice Your Preaching

By Alec Mouhibian

Last week we learned that some members of the Academic Senate have launched a crusade to ban the ROTC from campus. The crusade is being led by Charles Bazerman, chair of the Dept. of Education, and Thomas Scheff, a retir...

February 7, 2005

Private Dancer: More Than Youthful Fancy

By Alec Mouhibian

Who's afraid of Ayn Rand? If you've heard of Ayn Rand, whose centennial birthday was Wednesday, it is probably because you've read her novels The Fountainhead or Atlas Shrugged.

January 24, 2005

Private Dancer: Wake Up, Progressives

By Alec Mouhibian

The progressive movement sprouted from the idea that the world would really get somewhere if only everybody would let their lives be run by progressives. Central to the idea was a centralized and empowered government tha...

January 10, 2005

Private Dancer: A System With a Soul

By Alec Mouhibian

When I was a little child, my morality was driven by fear - not of God, but of Santa. Even if my parents had indulged me with religious teachings, I have a feeling that my fear of going to hell would have been less than ...

December 2, 2004

Perversions Over Politics?

By Alec Mouhibian

I reject the terms "liberal" and "conservative." In fact, I think everyone should refer to themselves politically by their sexual fetishes.

November 18, 2004

Why I Could Care Less About Elitist Liberal Ramblings

By Alec Mouhibian

I have better things to do than care about post-election Democratic stress disorder. Sure, it was delightful and satisfying to see so many people suffer from their own elitist delusions, but now the tantrums are getting ...

November 5, 2004

Welcome to a Nation Divided

By Alec Mouhibian

Among the things that culminated on this Election Day was one of the most impassioned and personal political hate-fests in American history. Last-minute examples included the revelation of Walter Cronkite's long suspecte...

October 22, 2004

Don’t Let Them Scare You

By Alec Mouhibian

The Office of Student Life displays a poster that says: "Vote, Because You Can." Beside the words, there is a picture of a dog looking like she just came out of a voting booth. The irony, apparently, is unintended.

October 11, 2004

Don’t Mix Sex And State

By Alec Mouhibian

There is nothing gayer - in the adolescent slang sense of the term - than the issue of gay marriage. Never have so many people whined so much over something that is so stupid.

April 30, 2004

Returning to the High School Womb

By Alec Mouhibian

It is widely acknowledged that UCSB is a pretty weird place. It's the type of place that when you hear about puppy love, it most likely has something to do with bestiality. This naturally came up when I visited my high s...

January 15, 2004

Campus Littered With CALPIRG Representatives

By Alec Mouhibian

Walking on campus recently, I was interrupted from an intense conversation with myself by a little man who asked, "Have you pledged for the environment yet?"

November 20, 2003

Frat Poker Tournament Deals Cash to Charity

By Alec Mouhibian

Card sharks anted up for a good cause yesterday at Corwin Pavilion, where the Phi Sigma Kappa fraternity held a charity event, titled the World Series Poker Tournament, to raise money for victims of the recent wildfires ...