Walking through the Arbor is a fate worse than death most days. Those petition-wielding beggars can smell a vulnerable person like a shark smells blood. Tablers will force you into a conversation, eve...
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So the end of the year is quickly approaching and leases need to be reviewed, but you have one critical problem: you want to live with your bestie instead of your roommate! Unfortunately, your roomie ...
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All students would be given the opportunity to print two false flesh flutes for the price of one.
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Chancellor Henry T. Yang announces the reroute of the Tour de France to the UC Santa Barbara bike lanes and enrolls each student as a racer.
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Honestly, it’s just a really bad financial decision on your part; she would’ve been so popular.
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“It’s so nice tah see all the Canadian flags aboot tahday, eh?” said Maple Snowbeaver, the Canadian exchange student in question.
April 20: Weed Day.
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Choked by their cap tassel during a graduation photoshoot
Accidentally daps the Chancellor up as they receive their diploma
Decided to skip commencement to go day drink on Del Playa
Ugly crying so hard they drown out "Pomp and Circumstance"
Posing on stage like there's a model scout in the audience (there was)
Can't make it up the steps due to the sheer amount of cords, stoles, and leis
Couldn't decide on a grad dress so they showed up in pajamas under their gown
Showed up to commencement high and suffering from horrendous munchies
Somehow juggling the 15 ceremonies required for their triple major
Graduated with a 5 year plan, chronic anxiety, and a great internship
Reading Kafka in the audience in hopes of an honorary English degree
had their graduation photos taken in the lagoon to be different
