Sit down Gauchos, we need to have a little talk…

The weather’s been great recently, and I’m not just talking about myself, although I have had a pretty good run. I mean, where do I come up with this stuff! But that’s not why I called you here. I realize that it’s hot outside, but this trend of guys going shirtless everywhere has got to stop. Seriously, like right away. No one will blame you if want to go demi-au naturale at the beach, but when you’re back in I.V. and rubbing shoulders with your peers at Deja or I.V. Market, you’ve got to shirt up. It’s man-law. Nobody wants to touch your man-sweat, especially around food. Wrap it up fellas.

Monday’s Forecast: Actually it’s probably a good idea to follow that last line any time bodily fluids are being distributed.