Juliet Becker/Daily Nexus

As a freshman, leaving De La Guerra (DLG) for the first time felt like surviving the apocalypse. Free of the active laxatives they lace their food with, now second-year Jenna Ortega remembered returning to UC Santa Barbara with renewed hope. Now, after two quarters of making her own food, Ortega actually misses the nasty ass burgers at DLG. 

“Like, maybe I was too hard on the chefs over there. The food they made was always consistent, even if it was bad. I can’t even make things taste bad in the same way twice!” Ortega said.

Coming into her second year, Ortega was determined to redefine her eating habits with fresh ingredients, healthy meals and a regular eating schedule to fit in her three meals a day. Her first week in her new apartment kitchen could’ve made for a viral cooking Instagram Reel — every day that week, she posted colorful salads, tender steaks and deliciously roasted vegetables. Halfway through her first quarter, most of Ortega’s meals were frozen, and she usually went out to eat anyway. 

“I just can’t. I even miss putting my dish on the return and watching it slowly rotate away from me. I didn’t even realize how great it was until dishes were piling up in my sink after cooking only one meal. Now I’m forced to leave my dishes in the sink until my roommate washes them, and it makes me feel kind of bad,” Ortega said.

Ortega shared that she has been on dating apps lately just to court a freshman that could get her into the dining hall. For those who miss the comforting high school cafeteria feeling that’s exclusive to DLG, it can be extremely difficult to transition into real life and responsibilities. Nobody claps when you drop a cup in your own kitchen. Nobody comes to your dining table with their big ass group of at least 20 friends. Nobody makes your shitty food for you. 

“I’m honestly going back to the dorms next year. Like it’s nice to have my own shower or whatever, but I don’t think I can actually cook again every day,” Ortega said. 

Most Gauchos have experienced similar levels of withdrawal after leaving the dining halls. Luckily, older students can still buy meal swipes and eat at dining halls, if they are looking to spend even more time being annoyed by freshmen.

Fart Tent misses Carrillo.