Babe, this is so unlike you, you’re acting kind of crazy right now … I don’t know where you might have seen that the other UCs are staying online longer, that would be insane. Where would you have even heard that? Your friends? People are kind of unreliable, babe, you don’t know where they could be getting their information from. You know I don’t trust your friends, and now they’re trying to make me look bad? This has got to be a joke, it’s so obvious

I know the other UCs — I talk to them all the time. They would never do something like that, and you can’t tell me you know them better than I do. I’m pretty sure I would know if they were extending online, babe, it’s kind of my job lmao. What do you think I do at all those meetings I go to? Just fuck around? I go to those meetings for us, babe! 

Are you sure this wasn’t a dream? Did you hit your head on the way home? I’m sorry, okay, I just really can’t take you seriously right now! 

Babe, okay, hold on, come back. I’m sorry. Just tell me how long they supposedly are extending online for. Until January 28????? Babe, do you know how insane that sounds?? Have you even talked to anyone else about this? I can’t be the only one who doesn’t trust this. Babe, all I’m asking for you to do is stop and think for a second, okay! Just use your brain! I know you’re smarter than this. Look at me, okay, you know I take COVID seriously, and I make sure we do our best to respond to it. 

Wait, what? Don’t even think about bringing up the hotel dorms right now, babe, I can’t believe you would do that. That really hurts. I can’t believe this. Can we just drop this? Please? That’s literally all I wanted. Jesus, thank you. 

Let’s just forget about all of this and go get some ice cream, okay? Thank you. Okay, don’t forget your mask, babe! Haha.

Meel F. Lover feels like a lighter next to a propane tank the way she’s being gaslit right now