I can only slap myself on the forehead when I let Texts From Last Night scoop me on something I should know about and would know about if I, I don’t know, bothered to read the news. Mostly it’s the death of a celebrity or something sports related or whatever jackass thing Jon Gosselin did this time. But sometimes it’s just embarrassing, like when that’s how I find out that pirates are hijacking ships and taking hostages, or that Sarah Palin resigned. I could almost use this to justify the amount of time I spend there except all I really learn about is bad anal experiences, the Plan B pill and being high out of your mind to the point where you think you speak Swedish. Actual news is really just filler.

Tomorrow’s Forecast: Uninformed? Ha! You can’t prove it.