So I was sitting/passed out by my front door Friday night when two toolish-looking guys walked past me, and, I kid you not, one of them was telling a story about how he played Seal songs the night before to set the mood during a hookup session. Personally, I could care less what people out there do to get laid. Some of you have to play cheesy love ballads, and some of us just have to walk out of the house (it’s pretty sweet). I am, however, a little concerned that Seal is still popular at all. I’ve never been a fan. He’s been “kissed by a rose on the grey”? What the fuck does that even mean? Plus, why is he considered attractive? He looks like his face caught on fire and someone put it out with soccer cleats.

Monday’s Forecast: The ‘human walks outside and bow chicka wow wow…

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