Apparently our friends in student government want to erect a statue on campus dedicated to student activism – presumably a gold sculpture of Prometheus with his thumb up his ass.
The ‘human has a few suggestions for the ideal location of this honorable edifice: 1) Completely submerged in the middle of the campus lagoon to symbolize students drowning in tuition fees. 2) On top of Storke Tower to symbolize the height of character it takes to be an activist. 3) In the burning pile of money that came out of my and all UCSB students’ pockets.

Friday’s Forecast: The ‘human has a green thumb.