One of my good friends tells me that she gets the female equivalent of blue balls whenever her desires are not being met – by way of her uterus contracting. After listening to this mix album, I can’t help but feel a musical sense of blue balls myself.

DJ Enrie is no stranger to spinning house music. He got his start in Los Angeles in the late ’80s alongside Richard “Humpty” Vission and DJ Tony B (who now gives us all his flava on Q-104.7), and they all quickly became L.A.’s biggest commercial DJs. Enrie made hard house his specialty, bringing a little bit of his native Queens to L.A. every morning on Power 106’s “Power Workout.” This album shows his technique needs no help – the man crossfades with a vengeance.

What does need help, however, is his record collection. The first four tracks are simply forgettable, giving way to decency in tracks five and six. After that, the blue balls set in; there are another four songs that just don’t go anywhere, followed by another couple of okay tracks – you see where I’m going with this.

It’s frustrating to be listening to the most proficient of DJs playing the most boring of songs. Even though the start-and-stop method can produce a greater climax, sadly, there is none on this album. Instead, you feel like you’re watching a Visa Check Card commercial, where the DJ couldn’t buy good records because he didn’t have his I.D.

What do you call someone who fetishes after anorexic people? The same thing you call Welcome to the Mix Show: lackluster.